With You
by KireiPhoenix
Summary: Ella meets the man of her dreams - who just happens to be the superstar Chris Brown, but just as she learns to trust in love again, he breaks her heart. While attempting to get over the big break up, her ex, James, tries to pry his way back in the picture but he has competition when Chris Brown returns, determined to win her heart back. Review Please!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"Could you please hurry up! We're ready to go and you're still painting your face in the mirror!" I yelled from the couch in the hotel room. "We'd actually like to _get_ into the club!"

"I'm coming now!" Tracy responded from the bathroom. Two minutes passed before she'd actually came out.

The three of us, Tracy, Naomi, and I, were headed to a club called My Studio. It was our last night in Los Angeles and we wanted to leave with a big bang. I chose this particular club because I heard my celebrity crush, Chris Brown, often frequented the venue when he was in town. I wanted to go back home to Oakland and say that I partied somewhere he did.

Tracy waltzed out in her black and gold strapless foil dress, fitting snugly against her slim, newly tanned frame. Her blond tresses were pinned on the sides, allowing her huge curls to fall down her back.

Naomi donned a pink shimmer bandage cut out dress that seemed to make her caramel skin glow. The tallest out of the three, her braids piled on the top of her head in a chignon seemed to give her even more height.

The slightly shy one in the group, I felt a little overdressed compared to them in my purple pleated flutter sleeve dress. I loved the one long sleeve and the draped back. Not wanting to spend so much time on my hair, I just added a few loose curls to my straightened hair and tucked one side behind my hair.

Arriving to the club via cab service, we were amazed once we finally got inside. The gold, marble, and black setting looked like a video shoot. Walking around looking like the tourists we were, we admired the photos of models, the extravagant chandeliers, and the grand piano that sat in the Library room. There was also a casting couch and a stage. The waitresses, looking like models their selves dressed in silk gowns that revealed lingerie beneath, flanked the VIP areas, servicing the elite. The entire setting made me feel like this was a place where my dreams could come true.

Tired of looking around, Naomi grabbed Tracy and I by the arm and led us towards the bar. Looking like a model herself, she was immediately tended to. Being the lightweight in the trio, I opted for a Baybreeze while the girls both ordered patron margaritas.

"You have to have a shot with us, Ella! This is our last night here!" Naomi yelled over the music.

"Yes!" Tracy agreed. "Three vodka shots," she told the waiter as he sat our drinks in front of us.

"What! I don't get say?" I rebutted.

"No!" They both shouted back.

The clear liquid felt hot and acidic as it traveled down my throat, causing me to scrunch my face. I immediately sipped my drink to get the taste out of my mouth. "That shot got me hot already. Now I'm wishing I'd dressed like you two," I said, feeling the heat spread through my chest.

"Excuse you! You try being five-nine for a day!" Naomi said in mocked anger.

"Yeah, because being five-four is so awesome," I replied with an eye roll.

"While you two fight, I'm taking my five-six self on the dance floor… See ya!" Tracy announced before walking off. Naomi and I followed suit.

The music was blasting at obnoxious levels, vibrating through the soles of my heels. With the shot and mixed drink in my system, I felt like I owned the dance floor. Only separating with my girls to dance with a few guys, we jumped, threw our hands in the air, and sang along to our favorite jams. By one-thirty in the morning I was ready to take a break.

Just as we were about to go find somewhere to sit, the music lowered and the DJ yelled, "We got Chris Brown in the house! Make some noise!"

I momentarily froze until the shrieks of females brought me back to the moment. I turned and saw him, making his way towards the DJ booth with his entourage and security. Dressed in denim shorts, a white tank, and a yellow belt with a matching hat, he looked befitting for the summer season. The DJ cut the previous track and began to play one of Chris's old feature jams, "Get Like Me". He danced along from the booth, shouting words out from David Banner's rap through the microphone he was given.

Not even knowing if my friends were behind me or not, I somehow made my way to the front of the swooning females – still in awe of us being at the same club. As his part was approaching, he walked around the front of the DJ booth, a bodyguard following close behind.

"The name you know of

A little bit of change now your boy done blown up

And I'm doing things that gets exposed

Stuntin' ain't a thing to me

And it's obvious, it's plain to see"

And then he stepped in front of me…

"That you gon' make us both

Get into some things that'll scare grown folks"

He thrust his pelvis forward and I could feel his nether regions against my stomach.

"Shit – they might even say you should leave me alone

Don't be scared

You need to get like me"

He sang to me, only inches from touching my face.

Stuntin' is a habit, just gotta have it

Shawty keep throwin' that thing at me

I'm gonna bag it

Don't you see the carrots - A real Jessica Rabbit

Can't no other boy do the things you like"

He's singing to me! Standing directly in front of me with his hand around my waist... I'm looking up into his eyes…

Stunned.

"He ain't your type, to change your life

But if you did your homework

Girl, I'm pretty sure you know what I got

Drop tops, and you know Jones and Banner gonna roll

Let me stop"

Then he walked away as he continued on with the song… I could've died at that moment and been happy with my life. My brain was screaming, "Chris Brown just sang to you! Chris Brown had his body on you!" but the rest of me was still floating through another galaxy. I felt the faint touch and heard the distant screams of Naomi and Tracy at my side screaming in excitement before I finally came back to Earth. Once the song was over, Chris and his entourage made their way to one of the VIP booths and I stepped out on the patio in hopes that the open air would help me find my mental equilibrium.

"Chris Brown!" Tracy shouted at me, still jumping with excitement. "I can't believe that just happened! How did you even get to the front so fast!"

"I don't know… I was just determined to get a closer look at him… Oh my freaking gosh! I felt his body against mine! If I was thirteen instead of twenty-five, I'd not wash for three days!"

"Then I'm glad you're twenty-five…I'm so jealous right now! Time for another round, ladies!" Naomi shouted, dancing her way back inside and towards the bar.

Filled with another drink, we were back out on the dance floor sweating it out when a gentleman in jeans and a basketball jersey grabbed my arm to get my attention.

"Chris wants to talk to you," he shouted over the music. He nodded towards the VIP booth. Following his movement, I looked right into Chris's eyes. He was watching me with a hand under his chin. Putting me into further shock, he raised the same hand and gestured with two fingers for me to come and join him.

Without waiting for my response, Jersey guy grabbed me gently by the hand and signaled for my friends to follow us. I turned back as we walked through the crowd to look at them and they could barely contain their selves. Three feet away from my celebrity crush, Jersey man let my hand go as Chris stood, meeting me halfway of the short distance.

"How you doin'?" he asked, holding his hand out. I placed my hand out, prepared to shake his but he held on to it and backed up towards where he was sitting, forcing me to follow him. He sat, not letting go of my hand until I followed suit. Tracy and Naomi sat on the side of me. "So what's everyone's name?" he leaned in and asked me. Feeling his breath against my ear and the side of my neck made my eyes flutter.

"I'm Ella," I blurted out too quickly. "These are my best friends, Tracy and Naomi."

"Nice to meet you ladies," he said, offering his hand for them to shake. "Help yourselves to anything." He gestured towards the table at the many bottles of liquor, including two magnum bottles of Ace Of Spades.

"Thank you!" Tracy said before leaning forward to fix herself a drink.

"Do you like champagne?" Chris asked, focusing his attention back to me.

"I do." Soon as the reply left my lips, he was signaling one of the waitresses to pour two glasses. I didn't mean I wanted a glass but I didn't want to tell him. "Thank you," I said to the waitress when she handed me a glass.

"Cheers!" Chris yelled with a huge, boyish smile, making my own lips turn up in the contagion. Everyone in the room held up their glasses and followed suit.

The champagne was delicious. It slid easily down my throat, hitting all my taste buds on the way and leaving a hint of sweetness in my mouth. I couldn't compare it to any other champagnes I've drank.

"I apologize if I interrupted your partying. You looked like you were having a good time out there. I just wanted to talk to you for a few minutes," he leaned in and said with a pretend apologetic look on his face, making me laugh.

"It's alright. I've been partying for almost a week," I told him.

"Celebrating something?"

"Yes, actually… My twenty-fifth birthday was three days ago."

"What! Yo, it's her birthday week!" he turned and said to his entourage before turning back to me and starting in on the "Happy Birthday" song, the entourage following along.

All of a sudden, others nearby began singing, causing a spiraling effect. The music was cut off and I could hear almost the whole club... Not one to enjoy the limelight, I attempted to cover my face in embarrassment but Chris grabbed my wrists and stood, forcing me to go along with him. Out of thin air it seemed, Chris was given a microphone and recited the last line into it, causing my name to be heard to the entire club.

As the club clapped and hooted, I waved and mouthed a "thank you", shaking with shock at the occurrence.

"Happy birthday, beautiful!" Chris shouted in my ear, putting an arm around my neck and pulling me close against him. The feeling of dying happy approached again.

As the music started again, we sat back down – him now sitting closer than before with his arm still around me.

"Thank you so much," I was finally able to say. "I can't believe that just happened!"

"You're welcome. Don't get no big head about it… Well bigger…" He joked, surveying my head.

"I do _not_ have a big head!"I gasped, lightly slapping his knee.

"I'm just playing with you… It's perfect…" He gave another one-hundred watt smile, leaving me with nothing to do but smile back at him.

As the conversation transgressed, the nerves went away and the two of us were talking as if we'd known each other for years prior to this magical night. I didn't even notice Naomi and Tracy's departure to the rest room. Or that a third of the club goers had left…

"Oh, shoot! What time is it!" I blurted out.

"Almost three-thirty," Chris told me, checking his diamond encrusted watch, a quizzical look on his face.

"We were supposed to leave a half hour ago. We have to get back to the hotel and pack."

"This is your last night here?" he asked. I thought I might've been imagining the disappointment in his voice.

"Yes. Our flight leaves at nine in the morning." I don't know why I felt like I was breaking bad news to him. "We have to get back to the hotel," I repeated.

"Where y'all staying at?"

"The Palomar..."

"Oh, okay. Y'all drove?"

"Took a cab…"

"Do y'all need a ride?"

"Oh, no! You've already been beyond generous tonight," I said standing up. Tracy walked over when she saw me stand and signaled for Naomi to come over. Chris stood and stared down at me. "Thank you so much for tonight. You have made my birthday one I'll never forget and won't ever be able to top. I can't even express my gratitude. This night was a dream."

After grabbing my purse from the couch and facing Chris again to say goodbye, he took off his watch and handed it to me. I stared down at the heavily studded watch, then back up to him with a bewildered expression. I looked at the watch again and back at him, trying to make sense of the situation.

"Hold on to it for me," he said. "If you got it, I know we'll see each other again." He tucked an unruly strand of hair behind my ear then leaned down and kissed my jaw line. As he settled back, he laughed at the expression on my face. "You have a safe flight, Ella. See you soon."

Still slightly lost, I say goodbye to everyone in the section and make my way out of the club. Naomi flagged down a cab and we headed back to the hotel, talking over each other about the night's sudden spin of events.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I laid back on my pillow, holding the watch up in the light of the table lamp. The diamonds sparkled like the sun was casting light on them. Chris Brown's watch… It was proof that my final night in Los Angeles wasn't a figment of my imagination. That and the photos online… I was still waiting to wake up as I placed the watch on my nightstand, turned off the light, and attempted to go to sleep.

The next morning at work, I got back into my normal life as a third grade teacher. Since it was the middle of July, I wasn't teaching a normal class but a summer school program. It was to get students into reading and to help those who had trouble with it.

"So whose turn is it to sit in the hot seat today?" I asked the class. The twenty children in my class nervously looked around hoping it wasn't them. "Lexie?" I teased, in a sing-song tone.

"Awe man!" She said before getting out of her seat and grabbing her book. She slowly made her way to the front of the class and sat in the big wooden chair.

"Tell the class what you're reading."

"I'm reading Judy Moody Was In A Mood by Megan McDonald."

"One of my favorites… Please share what it's about."

"It's about a girl named Judy who is mad because she has to start third grade at a new school and she doesn't think it will be the same as her last school. So she's mad at everything and everybody. She even says she doesn't like stuff when she really does because she doesn't want to be in a good mood and… That's all I got so far."

"Very good, however I_ do_ want you to use a thesaurus so you'll learn another word besides "mad". Now sit up straight and read the first two chapters to the class."

I continued this cycle with four more kids within the five hour class, letting them read on their own, helping them with words they didn't know and watching them take notes for their book reports.

"I want you all to study the words you've had the most trouble with tonight. I expect the definition and a sentence… Not from the story!" I added and a few kids groaned. "See you tomorrow!"

"Bye Ms. Daniels," they told me as they gathered up their belongings and walked out of the class.

July seemed to have passed by in snap. It was the end of the first week in August and I was at happy hour with my mom. She was fresh off of work, still in her nursing uniform. Angela and I looked somewhat alike, sharing the same mocha complexion, small nose, high cheeks bones, and skinny, yet curvy frame, but everything else was from my father – especially the full lips and slanted eyes. My mom being five-seven and my dad five-eleven, I had no clue where my height came from.

"So… I saw James in Wal-Mart the other day," she said as we waited for our drinks and appetizers.

"Gosh, Angie! You couldn't wait for the drinks to get here first?" I asked with an eye roll.

"He told me to tell you "Hi"."

"Well now you did. Next subject…"

"You need to stop treating that boy like that. Y'all could've remained friends."

"So I'll have to look at him and remember how he cheated on me? No thanks."

"He didn't necessarily cheat on you, Ella."

"He had a textual relationship with another woman. They even shared pictures. That's much worse to me than screwing some girl and moving on." The sentence came out a little harsher than I wanted it to.

"Ooh! Someone's all in their feelings right now."

"Oh yes!" I whispered loudly when the waiter walked over with our drinks. I drank half of my Midori Sour before my mom even lifted her margarita.

"Oh, you're in a mood now?"

"No," I lied. It frustrated me that it'd been almost six months since the break up and she still always seemed to bring him up. I found it downright outlandish that she wanted me to go back. Wait for him to _physically_ cheat? I don't think so.

After a few more drinks and some food, the mood was finally pleasant again. We were able to laugh and joke like friends. This was the woman I liked be around but the majority of the time, we butted heads. We didn't even get along until I moved out. My father and I were a different story. While my mother coddled and babied my older brother, my father treated me like his little princess. Sammie Daniels was a great man and always there when I needed him most, making up for the affection I lacked from his wife.

Walking the two blocks back to my apartment, we ran into my father. He was looking under the hood of a silver Toyota Camry. My car…

"Daddy, what are you doing?" I asked, walking over to give him a hug. He was dressed in his casual Friday attire. A white button down and gray slacks.

"Hey, Babygirl… I got bored waiting for you two. Just making sure your car is tuned up nicely."

"You did that two months ago. Do you think I creep out to illegal drag races at night or something?"

"I can worry all I want to."

"It's my right as a parent," I finished for him. "Just get your tipsy wife and let my car be."

"_Excuse_ you?" my mother interjected with a laugh.

"Trying to get rid of us? You got a date or something?" He tried to ask the question casually but I caught the narrowing of his eyes.

"I just have work to catch up on, daddy."

"Why you say it like that?"

"So you won't call every hour listening for a male suitor," I told him as I patted him on his back. He still treated me like I was sixteen sometimes.

"I wouldn't do that, Babygirl."

"Daddy…"

"Okay, we're going, we're going," he said, throwing his hands up in defeat.

After saying our farewells, I climbed the stairs to my one bedroom apartment and headed for the shower. Putting on my pajamas, I got into my usual routine of preparing a meal while my iPod played in the background, then loading up my DVR once I was done. I didn't have any work to finish… I only told my dad that so he wouldn't worry about me.

Being single after a three year relationship had been a major readjustment for me. I wasn't used to having plans or going out alone on weekends. Tracy had a fiancé she was living with and Naomi was always out with her new flavor of the month or going to clubs. That wasn't my particular scene… I was really beginning to miss being in a relationship.

"I guess today will be my turn to go," I said to my class after running out of students to call on for the day.

"Yes!" one of them whispered loudly.

"You'll be going first next Monday, Ramell," I informed him and the class laughed and jested.

"I was just playing, Ms. Daniels!"

"But I wasn't… Now quiet down. I'm going to read Amelia Bedelia by Peggy Parish. It's about a maid who takes instructions from her employer very literally. For example: If I was to say, "Shower me with gifts", she would think I meant I wanted to take a shower with gifts in the tub."

"Is she stupid or something?" Jasmine asked.

"No she's not. She just takes every word to mean exactly that. You'll see," I told her and then began to read.

The kids were deeply enthralled by the story – laughing at the quirky and weird behavior of Amelia Bedelia – when suddenly, one of them screamed.

"What's wrong, Sofia!" I jumped up in alarm. She pointed towards the door and I was afraid to look back. If it was a huge spider, a rodent, or a reptile, I would've tried to escape through the window, leaving the kids behind. As more kids started to scream and shout, looks of shock turning into excitement, I finally looked back and almost screamed myself.

"I'm sorry, did I interrupt your story?" the cause of the commotion asked.

"Chris? What are you doing here?" I asked, my voice two octaves higher than normal.

"You told me you worked here at Allendale so I came through to hear a story. I mean, if it's cool with the class," he looked back and asked. More screams of excitement broke out.

"Settle down! This is a school…" I told them. "Um, there's another chair at my desk… On second thought, you take this one," I said, giving him a glance over. He was wearing a pair of jeans shorts with a light blue shirt that had a mouse on the front dressed in purple, red, and yellow.

"I got it," he said with a smile as he went to grab the other chair. He waited until I sat down before turning his chair so that he was facing me with the rest of the children. There were still giggles and outbreaks of conversation. I couldn't blame them…

I nervously got back in the story, feeling like one of the kids as Chris watched me, looking highly intrigued. He even laughed along and interacted with the kids. It was all very surreal.

After class was over, all the kids lined up at my desk, waiting to get something autographed by Chris who happily did so. Once the final kid was out, I closed the door and locked it.

"You know they're about to tell all the kids they run in to that you're here… Which I still can't believe." He laughed and shook his head.

"I still can't believe you're really a teacher. You look more like a student."

"I'll take that as a compliment…"

"I wished my teachers looked and dressed like you," he said, leaning on the desk as he raised his brows like a cartoon character. I looked down at my blue Baby Doll top, Capri pants, and wedges. I thought I looked very casual. "Well there was one I had a crush on…" He added.

"I bet…" Suddenly there was rapping on the door and a loud buzz of excited children throughout the hall. "Uh, I think you better wait here a little bit while half of the kids get picked up and shipped off on buses.

"That's fine with me. Nothing wrong with being locked in a classroom with a fine ass teacher." The compliment had me biting my bottom lip to not smile so wide. I turned away from him, looking for something to busy myself with. "Am I making you nervous?"

"A little bit, yes," I answered honestly.

"Why?"

"Um, you're Chris Brown. Should I not be taken aback by you being in my city, at my school, and visiting me?"

"I thought you'd gotten comfortable with me that night at the club…"

"I wasn't sober then."

"Do you want to go get a drink then? I want you to be comfortable around me," he said, getting up and walking towards me.

"Go get a drink?" I asked a little breathy. His close proximity and being locked alone in a room with him shot a flash of heat to the pit of my stomach and the back of my neck.

"Or we can pick something up and go back to your place… If that's cool with you," he suggested.

"Um," was the only word I could get out. He stuck his tongue out to moisten his bottom lip and I felt another flash of heat somewhere else. My teeth grazed the bottom of my own lip and the air suddenly got thick in the room.

Just at that moment a whistle blew repeatedly in the hall, making us both jump and diffusing the tension in the room. Security guards were in the hallway escorting the students out of the building.

"Your savior has arrived," I said, stepping around him and heading for the door. I thought I heard him mumble something but when I turned and asked, he just shook his head.

"This is the strangest moment I think I've ever experienced," I said out loud as I stood in my kitchen.

"What's strange about it?"

"Oh, tons of famous celebrities come over and help me prepare a meal. Last weekend, Brandy came over and we made cupcakes," I responded sarcastically and he laughed.

"Can we make cupcakes too?"

"Whatever you want…"

"You sure about that?" he asked, stepping closer to me and grinning.

"Sir, you get back over there and cut those bell peppers!" I said with a laugh.

"You should've let me cut the onions though."

"I won't be responsible for Chris Brown having an injury due to ethylsufine in my presence…. Nope!"

"What?"

"What causes your eyes to burn and tear."

"Oh, but shouldn't I be more worried about you? I mean, you being so short and all, your face is right in it," he teased then laughed at his self, making me laugh as well.

"No cupcakes for you!"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I couldn't help it. You're still cute though."

"Oh, you're just saying that to get me to bake for you," I said as I added the onions to the ground beef cooking on the stove. Chris followed me over with his bell peppers.

"No I'm not. I'm giving you a compliment – which is actually an understatement."

"Oh… Well, thank you," I said without looking at him.

"You're welcome."

As we waited for the spaghetti sauce and noodles to cook, I began the mix for the cupcakes as Chris asked me questions. He asked about my family, friends, favorite activities, and past relationships.

"So you've been single for six months!" he asked in a disbelieving tone.

"Yes. Why do you have to say it like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like something must be wrong with me."

"Oh, nah… I just find it hard to believe that nobody has snatched you up yet."

"I don't really put myself out into the dating pool. If it happens, it happens. I have to feel something – sense a potential relationship before I say yes to someone."

"Do you feel something with me?"

My mouth slightly dropped open and all I could do was stare across the dining room table at his forehead. I couldn't believe he'd just put me on the spot like that. I slid my chair back and stood. "Would you like some more breadsticks?" I asked, grabbing the basket and going into the kitchen without waiting for his answer.

"So you're not going to answer me?" he asked when I returned.

"Nope..." I sat back down without looking at him.

"Why not?"

"Those are questions you ask after a first or second date."

"Is this not a date? We're having spaghetti and wine. We're getting to know each other… Should I have dressed up and brought flowers?"

"No… I just thought… I thought that you just wanted someone to hang out with." After the quietness in the room began to stretch longer, I finally looked at him and saw that he was staring at me. "What?"

"I didn't come all the way to Oakland to just hang out. I got plenty of people around me to hang out with and can get more… I've wanted to see you since you walked out on me at the club."

"I didn't walk out on you," I said, giving him a side eye.

"Well that's how I'm telling the story," he said, sitting back and folding his arms. "_And_ you wouldn't let me take you back to your hotel!" I couldn't help but laugh at his sudden attitude.

"I didn't want to you to cut your partying short and put you out of your way! I wasn't trying to run away from you." I thought suddenly crossed my mind. "Is that why you gave me the watch? To ensure I couldn't run?"

"Maybe…" he muttered, his head turned sideways.

"_Me_?" I asked, believing I must have misunderstood something.

"Why don't you believe anything I say to you?" He finally looked at me and his voice rang with a hint of frustration.

"Because…"

"Because what?"

"You're Chris Brown."

"And you're Ella Daniels," he replied, matching my matter-of-fact tone.

"I'm just some average person though. Nothing special about me."

"Ella, please don't put me on a pedestal that I don't deserve to be on and don't sell yourself short.. Just think of me as some dude you had a vibe with – don't deny you didn't – and that we're on a date feeling each other out. Can you do that for me, please?"

"I can try," I finally said after letting it sink in. He leaned forward and glared at me. "I can do," I rephrased.

"Good, because you got me putting myself out here like some sucker and I'd be upset if it was for nothing."

"What!"

"I flew to Oakland just to stalk your ass!" he shouted and I laughed.

"I suppose I _should_ be slightly alarmed by that… Not to mention showing you where I live and letting you in… You're still crazier though."

"Kiss my ass!" he said through laughter, throwing a piece of his breadstick at me.

"That hit my chin!" I gasped, eyes widened in shock at his laughter.

"I didn't mean to! I thought it would hit the table," he said, still laughing.

"It's not funny…" I muttered, throwing a piece back at him and hitting his shoulder. "My face probably smells like garlic now."

"Let me see…" He stood up, walked over to my chair and kneeled down at eye level with me before kissing my chin and then my lips. "It's fine," he said after licking his lips and standing.

I watched him walk back to his seat through a blur. What the hell was going on? Was this a long dream I still hadn't awakened from? None of this could be real… I couldn't possibly be sitting across from this man in my apartment eating dinner. I closed my eyes, counted to three and opened them.

"What are you doing?" he asked with a bewildered expression.

"Just testing something… How about cupcakes and ice cream now?"

"I'm a have to go back and get a serious workout in," Chris said, as we laid on my bed. It was his last day in town and he'd spent the previous night with me. After assuring me he wasn't expecting sex, that he just wanted to spend time with me before he left, I obliged.

He'd came on a Thursday and it was now early Monday morning. Just as soon as I was starting to grasp my head around the fact that I was spending time with Chris Brown, he was leaving.

"Don't blame me… You're the one who's been treating me like your personal chef," I argued, rolling my eyes.

"Ay, I helped though…"

"You did…"

"I appreciate it all. I've had fun spending time with you and wish I could've stayed longer."

"You're welcome. I suppose I had fun as well…"

"Oh, you suppose?" he asked, looking at me with a grin.

"Keep your dimples out of my eyesight! Those things are dangerous," I said with a laugh.

"Not compared to something else," he said, propping his self on his elbow and pushing his pelvis against my hip.

"Keep that away too! Besides, you have to go," I added after hearing the doorbell.

"I could catch another flight."

"Chris! Get out so I can get ready for school," I said, laughing as I got up to get the door. "He's on the way out," I told his huge bodyguard.

"I'll be downstairs," he said before turning. When I closed the door and turned around, Chris was leaning against the wall that separated the living and dining room with his shoes and his backpack on. I suddenly had the same feeling I did when I said goodbye to my father after moving out. I was going to miss him already and I barely knew him.

"Me too," he said, reading the expression on my face.

"Your watch… You're forgetting it," I said, walking towards his direction. Just as I was about to pass him, he stopped me by the shoulders.

"I'm serious, Ella. I don't want to go but I have to get back to business. I wish I could take you with me."

"Hush, you're making it worse," I muttered.

"Awe, are you going to cry?"

"Boy, please. I don't like you that much."

"But you like me… That's good enough for now. Hold on to the watch a little while longer."

"Why? You have my number and address now," I asked, narrowing my eyes.

"Just do it. Walk me to the door."

As we stood in front of the open door, he held me against his body for what felt like minutes before finally kissing the top of my head and releasing me.

"I'll see you soon," he said as he backed out and went down the stairs. I watched from the railing as he climbed in the car, stopping to kiss his middle and index finger then putting up the peace sign at me. Then he was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

I felt like a celebrity amongst my family, friends, and school. I couldn't get away from the constant Chris Brown questions. Naomi even visited my place more than usual just to try and spy on our phone and Skype conversations. She also couldn't go a day without expressing the fact that she couldn't believe he was interested in me. If I couldn't believe it myself, it would've made me angry.

The Summer school program was now over and I had a three week vacation before the actual school season started. Of course Chris insisted I spend a week of my vacation traveling with him but a week passed and here I was sitting in a studio with him while he worked on a few songs.

This man's work ethics were unbelievable. I loved watching him get into his zone as he worked on a song. All child's play ceased and a grown man appeared. He reminded me of my father.

"What are you smiling about?" he asked, turning back to look at me.

"Don't worry about me and worry about finishing up that song," I said, embarrassed over my thought.

"Not until you tell me."

"I don't want to," I told him, covering my face. I heard the chair slide over before he grabbed my wrists.

"I can't believe you're still so shy around me… Tell me," he demanded.

"I'm still seeing different sides of the kaleidoscope that is Chris Brown. You just reminded me of my dad." I spoke to my hands rather than him. When I finally looked up, he seemed to be blushing. I told him a lot about my father – how much I loved him and couldn't live without him – so what that meant to him, I was dying to know but he only kissed me and went back over to the soundboard.

Keeping up with his lifestyle was wearing me out. Sometime after two in the morning, I dozed off to the sound of his voice booming through the speakers in the studio as he recorded a song called, "Don't Wake Me Up". My sentiments exactly…

I was in a room filled with beds and I was walking around holding on to the blanket wrapped around me. I was searching for something, pulling back the blankets on each bed. After about fifteen beds, I began to panic and rush through the room at a quicker pace, determined and anxious. Just when I was ready to give up, I turned to the sound of voices murmuring. They were coming from a bed to my left so I took off in that direction. Standing in front of a huge, long bed, I walked to the head of it and pulled the blankets back. A look of relief came over my face as I'd finally found what I was looking for. The murmurs I heard were closer and the tone of one was very familiar to me. Just as I was about to climb in the bed, I was jolted awake by the feeling of me being lifted.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to wake you," Chris whispered. He was holding me like a baby against his chest and his jacket was wrapped around me. "We're heading home now. Go back to sleep." As I drifted off again, I smiled at the slip in his wording.

I woke up again, this time in an actual bed, with my head resting on Chris's arm. His other hand was wrapped around my waist. I smiled at how comfortable I felt lying next to him... I turned back to look at his face and he was asleep with his mouth slightly open. Lifting the blanket, I saw that I was only in my underwear and my t-shirt. Well duh, I could feel his legs against mine. I heard my phone going off in what sounded like the living room but as soon as I was about to get up, Chris tightened his arm around me and locked my legs between his.

"No, stay," he murmured in my ear.

"I can do that," I said, relaxing against him.

"Forever…"

"Um…" My body tensed. "I have a home and a job to get back to soon."

"No you don't. Stay with me." I wasn't sure if he was joking so I looked back at him. His eyes were still closed and there was no hint of a smile on his face.

"Chris?"

"Hmm?" he murmured.

"Are you sleep talking?" He didn't answer... I tried again to release myself from his hold, this time succeeding.

Checking my phone, I saw I had three missed calls and a text. I checked the text first. It was from my brother, Michael.

_**Don't 4get about Mariah's party dis wknd**_

Damn… Was it the end of August already? The third was three days away and I didn't even have a ticket to return home. Looking around the room, I saw Chris's laptop on one of the couches. It was still on when I opened it so I typed in his password and went on the site to book a plane ticket. He was going to be upset when he found out but I couldn't stay any longer. As much as I enjoyed the jet setting life and being with him, I had to go back. The email notification went off on my phone from the confirmation I had sent to it. It was done. Remembering to check my missed calls, I saw they were from Tracy, my dad, and the most recent being my mom.

"Hey Babygirl," my dad said after one ring. He sounded excited to hear from me.

"Hey daddy… What are you doing?"

"The usual… Ordering people around and getting work done."

"Sounds like a busy day at the dealership."

"It'd be a little less stress if you came on down and worked for me. I need my blood down here to make some sales."

"You just want me closer to you," I breathed out, rolling my eyes.

"So what if I do? And stop rolling your eyes before they get stuck!" The fact that he knew me so well made me laugh.

"Yes, sir." I heard a toilet flush. Chris was awake. "Hey dad, I'm going to call you back, my other line is ringing."

"Okay. I hope you're coming home soon. I love you."

"I love you too, bye."

"Good morning," Chris said, walking over with a smirk. He was in nothing but his underwear.

"Morning passed about an hour ago," I replied as he sat next me. He grabbed my unkempt ponytail and kissed me before speaking.

"Not in my world. I'd still be sleeping if you hadn't left me."

"Must you always talk about me leaving you?" I asked nervously. Breaking the news to him was going to be hard.

"What's wrong?" he asked, sitting up and looking at me.

"Nothing… Are you hungry?" I asked, my voice a little too high.

"You really can't lie…" he said with a head shake. "Tell me," he demanded.

"Well… My oldest niece's fifth birthday is coming up and her parents are throwing her a party," I told him as I played with my fingers in my lap.

"When is the party?"His voice was stiff, making me even more nervous.

"This Saturday." It sounded more like a question. "I already booked the flight."

He swallowed. "So when are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow." Another questioning tone…

I saw his jaw tighten before he stood up to pace back and forth.

"Chris, you knew I had to leave soon. You can't keep me here. I stayed as long as possible for you but time has run out now. We'll just have to go back to phone calls and Skype for a while."

He paced some more then abruptly stopped with an anxious look on his face.

"I can come with you. I can meet your family," he blurted out.

"What? No you can't," I said quickly through shock.

"You don't want me to?" His brows furrowed in confusion.

"That's not what I meant. You have rehearsals and a show coming up."

"I can reschedule."

"No you can't," I repeated exasperatingly. I slammed my face into my hands out of frustration.

Why was he making this so hard? I'd known him barely a month and things were moving way too fast. Our relationship – if that's what this was – was on a level I normally didn't enter into until at least three months. On top of that, he never let me leave his side or left mine. I knew he'd already rearranged his schedules to fit me in but I needed a break.

"Sit down, please?" I finally lifted my head and he was staring at me cautiously.

"I'm sorry," he said before I could speak again.

"For what?"

"Smothering you… I just feel so comfortable and close with you. I know you have to go back and… I don't know how to be without you anymore. I can't even sleep well unless I know you're next to me. I don't know how to let you go."

"Well now I feel guilty," I mumbled after taking it all in.

"I'm not trying to make you feel guilty or saying this to make you stay. It's just how I feel… I know it's all so sudden but I felt something the first time I saw you. I thought it was lust but when we started talking, I realized I wanted more than sex. I wanted you. Maybe I'm moving too fast but I can't help it. I don't know how to go at a regular pace with you but I don't want to scare you away." I didn't realize I was crying until he reached over, grabbed my face and wiped my tears away with both of his thumbs. I wrapped my hands around his wrists and kept them there.

"You're not scaring me away… But I am scared," I admitted.

"What do you mean?"

I pulled his hands off my face and placed my own in my lap before speaking. "I enjoy being with you, I really do, and I've developed feelings for you too but the stronger they get, the more I wonder…" I couldn't finish or look at him so I stared at my hands between my legs.

"Wonder what? Tell me, Ella…" he demanded when I didn't answer.

"I wonder when is it going to end. When are you going to get tired of me and move on? I know I shouldn't because we're not even together I but I already feel attached to you. I'm afraid of getting any closer and getting hurt."

"We're not together?" he said as if the news shocked him, making me look at him. "I thought we were. I know it hasn't been said officially but I thought it was common knowledge." My eyes widened and my lips curved into a smile but just as quick as it came, it faded.

"But for how long before you decide that you want better? How long before the clock strikes twelve and the fairytale ends? Why are you laughing when I'm being serious!" I demanded, watching him struggle to compose his face.

"I'm sorry but… Ella…. Cinderella?" he said, fully laughing now. I tucked in my bottom lip but in a matter of seconds I was laughing too.

"Chris!" I shouted, attempting to get back to the subject.

"Look, Ella," he said, shaking his head as if he were trying to get rid of all humor. "I think you're underestimating my feelings for you… And I wish you would stop downing yourself. I'm not looking to be with anyone else but _you_ and I mean for a very long time. You just said I've been trying to keep you here… Why would I do all that if this was only temporary?"

"I don't know," I murmured. I had no answer but I still couldn't grasp the rope he was dangling in front of me.

"Then stop expecting the worse. If you're willing to be with me, then that's just it. I'm already all in but I don't want to be the only one ready to jump. So I need to know, before you leave," – he swallowed hard at the thought—"that we are both in this. Officially as boyfriend and girlfriend..."

My eyes darted back and forth between his, looking for any hint that his proposal wasn't real. All I saw was a man who wanted an answer. As he waited for it, expectancy was quickly turning into impatience.

"I suppose I can do the girlfriend thing…" I told him, my smile returning.

"You suppose?" His usual effect of this question was lost due to the blatant excitement on his face but I played along.

"I can," I responded, unable to contain my own excitement.

He jumped up and I squealed out of shock as he scooped me off the couch and threw me over his shoulder. Fear had me grabbing on to his waist and laughing uncontrollably as he raced towards the bedroom, slamming the door with his foot behind us.

"Oh my gosh! Look at how much you're glowing!"Tracy shouted as she got out of her car and rushed over to give me a hug. I was at the Oakland Airport and she'd insisted on picking me up when I told her I was returning home.

"I've missed you too," I said, blushing at her comment.

"I feel like I haven't seen you in months! We need to have a girls night and catch up. I want to know all about your extended trip with Mr. Brown. I thought you were never coming back." I had to suppress a laugh.

"You have no idea," I said with a head shake.

"Did you leave with all of this luggage for one week?" She asked as she grabbed one of the three suitcases.

"Uh, no… Chris has a shopping problem," I replied as we dragged them over to her car.

As we pulled away from the airport and headed to my apartment, I finally felt the pull of being away from Chris and missed him already. I'd already called him the moment I landed, as promised, but I was glad to hear his voice so soon when he called me as I unpacked.

"Auntie Ella!" Mariah shouted as I made my way into my parents' backyard. It'd been transformed into a Hello Kitty themed extravaganza.

"Hey Mimi! I've missed you!" I told her as I picked her up and swung her around. "Happy birthday!"

"Thank you, auntie. I'm five now."

"Five! Let me look at you…" I stood her back on the ground and stepped back. She was decked out in a Hello Kitty top with a matching skirt and sandals. Even her long, curly ponytails donned the themed accessories. "You sure you're five? You still look the same to me," I told her.

"I am, auntie!" she said through laughter.

"If you say so… I can't believe you'll be going to kindergarten in a week!"

"I got a Hello Kitty backpack too. I saw it before my daddy wrapped it," she said in a low voice to me.

"What!" my brother said from behind me. He was holding his other daughter, Meagan, who was one now. "I should take it back…"

"Don't say that to her! You'll make her cry at her own party," I warned him. "He's playing, Mimi. Go ahead and play."

"Her little sneaky behind… I knew I should've brought everything over here," he said, watching her run off to join her friends. "So you made it, I see…" He sounded and looked like a taller version of our mother with the prying glare he was giving me.

"Shut up and give me my other niece," I told him, holding my hands out for her. She jumped in his arms as she fought to get to me. "Hey my little Meg pie!"I said, kissing her cheeks and she laughed, showing her four teeth.

"So what's going on with you and this Chris character?" he asked in his grilling tone.

"Oh, Meg pie… Your dad still thinks he can intimidate me like we're still in school. He's so silly!" I said to her and she jumped and laughed again.

"Don't be trying to turn my child against me."

"Hush, Mikey… Where is Lauren?"

"She should be walking in any moment. We forgot to get candles when we picked up the cake."

"We?" Lauren said in her Spanish accent as she walked over. His wife looked like Eva Mendez with a video vixen's body. She didn't take any mess from him and that's exactly what he needed in a partner. He was our mother's junior and I knew firsthand just how frustrating and tough that could be to deal with. "Hey chica?" she said, kissing me on the cheek then wiping it with her thumb to remove the lipstick.

"Hey sis in law… You came just in time." I said as I handed Meagan over to her.

"Is Michael getting in your personal business again?"

"What!" he shouted, trying not to look guilty.

"You know you're so hard on us girls. Always complaining about make-up and clothes and heels and too big earrings… Ay dios mio!" she said with a sigh.

"Such an old man!" I added.

"Yes!"

"Ay, ay, ay! Y'all break this girl power moment up!" he said, playfully pushing me on the shoulder.

"You touch me again and I'm telling daddy!" I said, pushing him back.

"Always tattle-telling!"

We went back and forth for a few minutes longer before I went off to get some food. I was tempted to run off with one of the Hello Kitty Edible Arrangements they had as the centerpieces on the tables. Some of the fruit was even shaped as the popular kitten.

As I mixed and mingled with some of the kids parents helped Lauren host the party, I kept up a text conversation with Chris. I was really missing him, watching my brother with his wife, my dad with my mom, and some of the moms whose husbands tagged along. I told this to Chris and he scorned me.

_**I could've been standin right beside u but u told me NO!**_

_Don't shout at me! & you had other engagements. _

_**I'd rather be engaged in u *wink*wink*nudge*nudge***_

_Stop being nasty while I'm surrounded by children._

_**Ok I'll wait until u get home for that :D**_

"It's time to bring out the cake," Lauren said from the side of me, making me jump. I immediately clicked the lock button on my phone and sat it on the kitchen's island. "What are you doing in here, sucia?"

"Nothing," I replied with a smile.

"Uh huh… I know what you're up to. That's how your brother and I got two kids."

"Ugh! I don't need to hear this!" I shouted at her through plugged ears.

"Okay, I get it!" she replied through laughter, snatching my arms down.

The cake was humungous. It had three tiers that were shaped like gift boxes with an edible Hello Kitty figure on the top of it. The whole thing was white, pink and black with candy pearls closing the lining of each layer. It was a masterpiece waiting to be devoured by excited four and five year olds.

After everyone had their fill of cake and ice cream, the party went inside to watch the birthday girl open her many gifts. She was in Hello Kitty heaven! From the clothes and pajamas, to slippers, to toys and candy dispensers, her eyes lit up with every gift reveal. I'd given her a bag full of school clothes with matching accessories and a wallet. Inside my bag was another one from Chris.

"Ay dios mio! Are these real!" Lauren asked when she opened the box and saw the little hoop earrings with the diamond studded Hello Kitty charms that dangled from them.

"Those are from Chris," I said nervously. I hadn't told anyone but Tracy about us being official but now it'd be obvious with him buying my niece a birthday gift. Unable to look at my family's reaction, I focused on Mariah's elated expression.

"Can I wear them now?" she asked; her eyes ready to pop out of their sockets.

"You sure can baby… Give him a thousand and one thank you's from me!" Lauren said, still admiring them. I heard the murmurs as the kids and parents admired the earrings, and was glad of my skin color or else I would've been flame red at the moment. Why didn't I let him come?

As the party died down and guests began to leave, I made my exit as well, citing that I had to meet my main girls for dinner as my excuse. I didn't want to get grilled by my family once everyone left.

Arriving at Applebee's early. I ordered myself a cocktail and waited for Tracy and Naomi to arrive.

"I knew you'd be here early. Running away from hyper children," Tracy said as she got to the table and sat down.

"No, I was running from the Daniels. I'm used to children."

"Oh they're still not used to the Chris thing?"

"_I'm_ not used to the Chris thing."

"Did you tell them about it being serious?"

"Nope… It's just all so soon, you know? It's like I just met him but then I feel so close to him in that short of a time. Like time froze but we kept on moving and bonding. On top of that, I feel like we're in two completely different lanes." I stopped talking once the waitress came back. We ordered more drinks since Naomi hadn't arrived yet.

"Ella? Ever since I met you in third grade, I always admired how humble and modest you've been, but now that we're adults I think it may have stifled you. You're not just some ordinary school teacher... You're an attractive woman and a beautiful person. Chris instantly saw what we've all seen over the years and loves it already. Why can't you? Why don't you believe you deserve someone on a higher caliber than the regular blue collar men in this city?"

"Okay, enough Tracy! You're about to make me shed tears in public," I said as I dabbed at the ones pooling under my lids.

"Awe, give me a hug," she said, holding out her arms. Her eyes were glistening as well.

"You've always been such a punk… That's how I met your ass in the first place," I said, obliging to her request.

"I wasn't a punk! You try being the new White girl at a school with mostly Black kids. I got picked on until we became friends," she said, pouting as she remembered our childhood.

We talked more about the past as we waited for Naomi, who never showed. We called her phone but were sent straight to voicemail so we went ahead and ordered food.

After I went home, I tried to think about the last time I'd had an actual conversation with Naomi since I told her of my vacation. She never called or text me while I was away and I'd only had a brief three-way conversation with her as we planned to meet for dinner. My thoughts on the situation were cut short when Chris's ringtone played from my phone.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Getting back into the routine of school once again, the only major time I had with Chris was on the weekends but even those were shortened as his schedule got busier as well. I'd finally spoken with Naomi as we met with Tracy to go over details for her wedding. It was in November and we still hadn't agreed on dresses for the wedding party. After she finally came to a conclusion, I pulled Naomi to the side to ask her about the distance I was feeling from her. She assured me everything was fine and that she was just going through something with her boyfriend, so I dropped it. I guess she forgot Tracy and I talked all the time so I knew she'd been keeping in touch with her regularly but if she didn't want to say anything, I wasn't going to press her for the truth.

When October came, I had another job added to my list. Planning the bachelorette party… I'd booked the hotel, found someone to cater and make the cake, got decorations and party favors, but I still hadn't gotten a stripper.

"How about I come out and shake something for y'all," Chris suggested as I told him about my problem.

"I know women can Google you and see you in damn near nothing, but no. We're going to have some issues if I see a woman lay a finger on you in front of me."

"And we're going to have some problems if some dude is swinging his meat in front of your face," he shot back.

"This isn't for me. I've never liked strippers either."

"Oh, but you didn't stop me from giving you a private show," he reminded me.

"That's different. You're-," I began then paused. I still wasn't used to the terminology I was about to use.

"Say it…"

"Say what?"

"I'm your… what?"

"Ugh! Why does that excite you so much?" I asked, trying to distract him.

"Because it does… Now say it," he demanded, my attempt failing.

"My boyfriend... Ugh! I feel like a teenager when I say that…"

"Nothing really matters

I don't really care

What nobody tell me

I'm gonna be here

It's a matter of extreme importance

My first teenage love affair"

I couldn't help the giggles that escaped from my throat as he sang the chorus of the Alicia Keys song. The song almost described me from beginning to end - plus I couldn't help getting wrapped up in Chris's random outburst of tunes.

"I want to crawl through the phone and plant kisses all over you," I told him after composing myself.

"In three weeks… It can't get here fast enough for me," he said and I could picture his bottom lip jutting out. He was coming down to accompany me to the wedding.

"I can't believe one of my best friends is getting married… We grew up together and now we're adults having lives of our own. It's so crazy… I feel so old!"

"You're only three years older than me, not eight."

"Don't you dare remind me of that either!" I warned with humor in my voice.

"What's wrong with that? I love it… You look younger than me anyway."

"Yeah, yeah… I have an appointment to get to though."

"What appointment?" he asked in alarm.

"A meeting…" I told him with my eyes closed as if he could see me.

"Are you meeting strippers?"

"I'm the maid of honor, Chris. It's a part of my duty. Naomi and Lauren are going with me," I added, hoping it would soften his grievance.

"The married one, I don't mind but the single one…"

"She has a boyfriend."

"Even worse..."

"What do you mean?"

"She gave one of my homeboys her number."

"She did?" This was new news to me.

"Yeah, he never used it though…"

"Hmm," I said under my breath as some puzzle piece clicked in my head. I couldn't figure it out though.

"What?"

"Nothing… I must bid you farewell though. And don't worry – I'll pick one that looks like Rick Ross," I teased and he laughed.

"Oh, is that your type?" he joked back.

"No, you're my type," I told him and he paused.

"Good answer… Damn good answer… You can go now."

"Oh, I can? Why thank you, oh gracious sire."

"No problem, peasant," he replied with a laugh.

"Peasant!"

"I'm playing, babe. Text me when you got time."

"Okay." I waited for his farewell but he remained on the phone. "Keeping me on the phone isn't going to prevent me from going…" I warned him.

"Fine! I'll talk you later." I heard him sigh before I hung up.

"I feel so uncomfortable," I murmured to Naomi and Lauren as we sat at the table with practically naked and oiled down men in front of us. They were putting on a show like I've never seen. Naomi enjoyed every minute of it and Lauren had an unreadable expression on her face as if she was judging a competition. There were seven different shades and sizes – and I mean that in both ways. One of them had a penis that just couldn't be real. I was tempted to take a picture to send to Tracy but I heard Chris's voice in my head and mentally smacked my hand at the idea.

We decided on one who called himself Chocolate Thunder since Tracy's motto was "The blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice". Her fiancé was from Montego Bay and almost as dark as you can get... Before leaving, Naomi asked for one last show from the dancers and of course, they didn't say no to her. I left the table and pretended to be busy on the phone with something while I waited.

"I don't know how people spend time in strip clubs," Lauren said as we left the club. "It only makes me want to go home to my husband."

"Ah! None of that!" I told her, waving a hand in the air.

"I'm sorry but it does! That was too much!" Her accent was always thicker when she got anxious.

"I'm ready to go home myself – even though I have nothing to go home to…" Thinking of Chris suddenly reminded me of something. "Naomi?"

"Hmm?" she said, slightly distracted as she fiddled with her phone.

"I didn't know you were interested in one of Chris's friends. I didn't see you two exchange numbers." I added the word in to not put her on blast. Her eyes shot up from her phone and over to me. For a split of a second, I thought I saw anger in them.

"Oh yeah, I was just doing a little networking, you know…"

"Oh…" I said with a nod. I knew she was lying because she always added "you know" to the end of a sentence when she did. I made a mental note of it and changed the subject. "So what are your plans for the night?"

"Going to check out a new club with some friends in San Jose… I actually have to get going now. Traffic, you know. I'll see you soon," she said, hugging my shoulders and waving at Lauren before rushing over to her car.

"Something wrong?" Lauren asked as I watched Naomi back out of the parking lot and disappear into traffic.

"It's nothing…Let's go," I said, pressing the door lock on my car keys and climbing in.

After dropping Lauren back home, I made a stop at my parents' house since it was around the corner. I was glad when I pulled up and only saw my father's car in the driveway. Using my key, I opened the front door and found him on the couch eating fast food and watching a Clint Eastwood movie.

"Oh, hey Babygirl," he said when he saw me.

"In & Out Burger? Really?" I asked as I sat in one of the recliners.

"I have an extra one with special sauce on it," he said as if he was waiving bait in my face.

"Gimme!" I said after a long pause.

"I knew you couldn't resist," he teased after I took a huge bite.

"You still shouldn't be eating this, daddy. I need to come over more and cook for you."

"Don't you worry about your old man… You look like you need a good night's sleep."

"I'll be alright…"

"How is the wedding coming along?"

"You know Tracy," I responded with my mouth full of food.

"Being indecisive and bossy?"

"Of course… If this is what weddings do to people, I'm just going to elope."

"Oh no, Babygirl… You can't deny me the honor of walking my only daughter down the aisle." I stared at him with a look of shock. That was so unlike him to say. "If it's going to happen, I want to be there."

"Yeah, if…" I said, rolling my eyes.

"So how are things going with Chris?"

"Pretty good… He'll be here next month."

"Things are getting serious, huh?"

"Why do you say that?" I asked, nervously. He was looking at me like he'd caught me outside kissing my boyfriend goodbye.

"You wouldn't have invited him to the wedding and he wouldn't be flying out here to attend for you."

"Maybe he likes weddings…"

"Babygirl? Who do you think you're talking to? I might be an old cat daddy but I know things…"

"Cat daddy! Ugh, you just ruined music for me…" I said, sitting the rest of my burger down and he laughed.

"Don't have me get up and do the dance now…"

"They should've never gave you old people cable!" I shouted as I leaned back in the recliner with my arms over my face.

After the jokes died down, my father cleared his throat and sat forward with his elbows resting on his knees.

"How are you really, Ella?" He only called me by my name when I was in trouble or when he knew I was keeping something from him. I shrugged my shoulders. "Mm mm… Get over here," he said, tapping the couch cushion next to him. I sighed as I got up and sat next him.

"Okay, Dr. Sammie Daniels… What do you want to know?" I asked, leaning my head against his shoulder.

"Does this have to do with Chris?"

"No… Well not really… I'm not sure…"

"Well who are you sure about?"

"Naomi. It seems like the closer I get to Chris, the further she pulls away from me and I'm confused because when I met him in Los Angeles, she was so excited for me… When he came out here she was too but that all lasted up until when I went to visit him. I don't know what happened…"

"Did you talk to her about it?"

"I tried but she lied to me. She's been lying to me ever since."

"Well then let it end there."

"What!" I said, lifting my head in confusion. "She's one of my best friends. We've known each other for eleven years."

"I'm not saying stop being friends with her but don't make her issue with you your own issue with you. You haven't done nothing but live your life and be happy. Yes, I know you're happy with this boy no matter how short of a time you've known him. I can see that…If your happiness is causing her jealousy for some reason, are you going to break up with Chris to make her feel better?"

"No."

"Then let it end there. Don't worry about her because if you do, it's going to stress you and strain what you have with him. You can't let somebody take your happiness away from you because they're not happy in their own life. If they're not willing to take your pain, don't let them have your joy."

"I love your life gems… Thank you, daddy," I said, resting my head back on his shoulder.

"I always have them for you whenever you need them… You look so tired. You want to stay the night here?"

"Not tonight, but I better go before it gets too late. Is mom working late again tomorrow?"

"Yep. Another overnight shift..."

"I'll come back in the evening and cook then. You need a real meal," I told him as I stood.

"I told you I'm fine. You just get some rest, Babygirl."

"I'll sleep all day tomorrow but I'll be back."

"Okay," he said as if he was letting me win but I knew he was happy.

Soon as I got home, I sent Chris a text to let him know then headed straight for the shower, peeling my clothes off along the way. The wet heat felt so good against my skin as it caressed me in all the right places. I hadn't had a good night's sleep in almost a month and it was finally catching up to me. Just as I got through tying my hair up my phone went off.

"You called just in time," I said, answering it.

"Time for bed already?" Chris asked.

"Understatement."

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing you need to worry about. Just put me to sleep," I told him as I climbed into bed.

"I can do that better in person…"

"Oh, Mr. Brown…"

"Yeah, that's what you'll be saying."

"Don't be trying to start anything you can't finish…"

"Word? Okay… We'll see about that…" I was tickled pink by the threat.

"So anyways… How was your day?" I asked, not wanting to stick on the subject when it couldn't be handled at the moment.

"Terrible," he breathed out.

"Why was it terrible?" The concern woke my mind up.

"Because you weren't here…"

"Awe, don't say things like that," I whined.

"Why not when it's the truth?" he asked defensively.

"Because it's makes me feel bad."

"You're the one who said you wanted space. Why would you feel bad if you're getting what you want?" I could tell he was pouting.

"Oh my gosh…" I groaned. "I know you're catching an attitude because you miss me so I'm not going to take it personally, but I'm going to go to bed." I wasn't in the mood tonight for a reassuring talk.

"I'm sorry… I'm just not used to this," he muttered.

"What, not getting what you want?"

"Yeah," he admitted.

"Well I'm not used to being so submissive."

"I'm not trying to make you be - at least not intentionally. I just want my Ells back."

"Ah, I want to kick you and kiss you at the same time," I huffed. "And don't say anything about how I could if I was there!"

"Get out of head," he said through laughter, making me laugh too.

The conversation was saved. I drifted off to sleep as he told me about his busy day and his plans for the upcoming week.

I was in the room of beds again and something was in my hand. A pocket watch… When I looked at it, the second hand began to move in slow motion and the faint sound of breathing alerted me that I wasn't alone. I tried to move towards the sound but every movement I made was slowed like someone had hit a button on a remote. Frustrated by the slow pace, I stopped trying to go to the sound and looked for a way out. I turned and saw a door with light emanating from the cracked opening. As I walked towards the door, the pace was normal but the breathing got heavier. The closer I got, the rougher the breathing got. It sounded as if the person would go into cardiac arrest…

Turning away from the door, I set off for the sound again and had the same trouble as before but I kept going. Finally arriving back to the big, long bed, I saw someone tossing and turning in it. The comforter was on the floor and the sheets were tangled around their body. It looked like they were having a nightmare… I climbed on the bed and tried to wake the person up and when I shook them, the blanket pulled back from their face and I was staring at myself.

I had that same dream every night for a week straight, each time waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, unable to breathe. I didn't know if it meant something or if my mind was reacting to the lack of sleep but I prayed for the day they would end. I was beginning to wake up with bruises from all the thrashing I did and I was running out of bed linen.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The wedding was a week away and I took a few days off of work to be there for Tracy. The last minute details and making sure everything was perfect was driving her crazy. Her dad flew out with his new wife, her mom was there with her husband, and the two of them seemed to be having a competition. If they weren't arguing over who chipped in the most for the wedding, they were trying to outshine each other with their partners and their happiness. If they weren't doting over the bride to be, they were sending subliminal shots out about who was smothering her. It was funny to me but Tracy was ready to kick them and their dates out of the wedding.

"They're not even acting like a mom and dad to me right now, Ella. They're just John and Francis," she complained. She was hiding out at my apartment again, babysitting a glass of Pink Moscato.

"Honestly, Trace… I think your parents need to screw," I bluntly told her. She happened to take a sip of her drink right at that moment.

"What!" she choked out. "Why would you say that?"

"Because they care too much about the other person's business… There's so much sexual tension that they can barely remember why they're here together. A quickie would fix that…"

"Ew! I don't want to think about that right now… There should be some intercourse age limit or something." I stared at her blankly.

"Seriously? You'd mandatorily give up sex?"

"Okay, bad idea… But it's just… Ooh!" she said with a shiver.

"I get it…"

"Do you think your parents still…you know?"

"I said I get it! Let's go over these seating charts again," I told her as I shook my head to get rid of the image.

"I think they do… Uncle Sammie is always in a good mood," she added quickly, laughing at the disgusted look on my face.

"I hope your cookie dries up at thirty-five," I cursed through narrowed eyes, making her laugh harder.

After going over the seating charts, we double checked the wedding programs, names on the place cards for the reception, checked the list of vendors to make sure everyone was paid and confirmed their arrival, recounted the favor bags to make sure there were enough, and tried on her wedding dress to make sure it still fit. Everything was set and perfect.

The next morning I went shopping for something for Tracy and I to wear to the rehearsal dinner, picked up the jewelry for the wedding party to wear, picked up her veil, and picked up another special gift I'd gotten her for the big day. Tracy spent the day with her fiancé and his parents. By the time I'd gotten home from running back and forth across town I was ready to fall face first on my bed but Tracy wanted to come over to see what I'd gotten her to wear and see the final look of the jewelry.

While waiting for her, I ended up falling asleep anyway and found myself in the room of beds yet again. It was the same as the other dreams but this one seemed darker… In the others the beds were laced with white linen but now everything was black and a hard wind from somewhere was blowing the long black curtains in the air violently. It was like they were alive and trying to grab at me. I felt an evil presence in the room as well and heard whispering from a woman. I called out to find out who it was but my question was only answered by the reply of soft, sinister cackling. Afraid, I turned to find the cracked door and escape from this dark room but I heard the door slam shut in the distance, making the room even darker. I tried to run towards the sound but something in the darkness grabbed me, causing a terrified scream to escape from me before I was shaken awake.

I open my eyes and Tracy is standing over me with fear ridden on her face. As I stare at her confused, she grabs my face and I can feel the sweat from my face clinging to her palms.

"Ella, can you hear me?" she asks, making sure I'm really awake.

"Water," I whisper through the pants. She rushes out of the room and back into the living room in moments. I drain the glass in three gulps.

"Do you need more?" She looks slightly relieved but the fear is still strong in her face. What did she see? I try to clear my throat and it feels as if my air passage is as thin as the red straws used to stir coffee.

"No," I respond with a rasp.

"What the hell were you dreaming about, I heard you from outside the door saying 'please'. I thought someone was in here hurting you so I used the key you gave me and saw you on the couch. I thought you were possessed. Are you sure you're okay?" She moved the damp hair from my forehead and placed her hand on it.

"I'm fine… Just another nightmare…" I assure her as I sit up and slide towards the middle of the couch.

"Another! This has happened before?" she asks, sitting down. I smoothed the rest of my hair away from my face, suddenly feeling very clammy.

"Yes, but I'm fine. What time is it?"

"Almost ten… I'm sorry for being so late. Kenneth had to make a few stops before we got home," she rushed out. I assumed she thought I wouldn't have had the dream if I hadn't been waiting up for her.

"It's not your fault and I said I'm fine."

"You don't look it… I'm sorry I've been putting so much strain on you to help me with the wedding and-."

"Tracy! I said it's not your fault. You didn't cause it. They're just dreams… I don't know why I have them or what they mean, they just keep coming…"

I tried to explain to her the dreams as she made me tea but she was just as confused as I was. She insisted on staying the night over to look after me even though I protested until my mouth dried. Still very tired, I gave up and headed off to take a shower. The moment I was out and dressed in my pajamas, she was ordering me to get in the bed. By the time she'd grabbed a pair of my pajamas and made her way towards the bathroom, the muscle relaxant she'd given me took its affect and I was drifting. The last sound I heard was the tone from a cell phone going off.

"Shh, it's just me," a familiar voice murmured as I got ready to lurch out of the bed when I felt a strong body maneuver itself against mine.

"Chris! What the hell are you doing here?" I asked after sitting up and turning on the light over my headboard. I had to make sure he was really there and it wasn't a dream.

"I'm happy to see you too," he said with a twinge of pain in his voice.

"No! I mean… You're here two days early. I'm happy but I'm surprised," I explained. His lips were about to form into a smile but then a thought suddenly crossed his mind and he looked upset.

"Why didn't you tell me about the nightmares you've been having?"

"What?" I asked, confused. How did he know? I rubbed my forehead to try and wake myself up more.

"I called last night for our "before bed" conversation but Tracy answered instead of you." Yeah, he was upset.

"Where is Tracy?" I asked to both stall and because I was curious. She was supposed to be sleeping in the bed with me.

"She just left… Got on the first thing I could out here and she offered to pick me up." He pulled my phone out of his pocket and handed it to me.

"You came out here because of a dream?" This was baffling me.

"No, I came out here because of a dream that's been hurting you. You still haven't told me why you didn't tell me," he remembered.

"Well… Because… Well…" I looked at the length of his body on my bed to explain my answer without words.

"Well duh!" he shouted, understanding my gesture. "You think I would stay away if I know you're suffering?"

"I'm not suffering! Tracy over exaggerates." Before I could say another word, he sat up against the headboard and touched a bruise on the lower end of my thigh I didn't know was there. He then grabbed my chin and rubbed his thumb across my lip. Sliding my tongue across the spot he'd just touched, I felt a fading lump on the left corner.

"I didn't come here to yell at you, Ells – even though you deserve it… I came here to be with you because I know you need me. I don't ever want to hear no shit like that from somebody else about you again." His words rang with finality. I let out a long exhale and rested my head against his chest. He immediately wrapped his arms around me and I smiled at the instant sense of comfort I felt.

"I missed you too," he replied to my smile before kissing the top of my head. Not satisfied, I sit up and lean in for a real kiss.

He quickly obliged with a soft kiss that transformed into one of hunger and need. He grabbed me by the waist and maneuvered me onto his lap, his lips never parting mine, and a moan escaped as I felt his stiff member beneath me.

In a movement so swift it left me breathless, I was now under him as he gazed down at me – his light brown eyes staring at mines with a deep longing. I was sure, due to the electric current flowing from chest to my center, that mine matched his. I was ready to lose myself with him again.

I woke up with my head rested on his chest and one arm and leg wrapped around his bare body. My other arm was awkwardly raised at shoulder level against his arm and our fingers were intertwined. Moving slowly so I wouldn't wake him, I lifted my head to peer at his face but he was staring down at me with a soft smile on his face.

"Hi," he whispered.

"How long have you been watching me sleep?" I whispered back.

"Not that long," he replied in his morning voice. "You smiled in your sleep and I've been waiting to see you do it again."

"As long as I didn't say anything," I said with a coy expression. He was instantly intrigued by it.

"What would you say in your sleep?"

"Unt unh…" I shook my head slowly with an intrepid grin. He wasn't getting that answer out of me.

"That just makes it even worse. Tell me, please?" he begged.

"Nope! We have to get up anyway. Wedding rehearsals and dinner…"

"We got time…" he said after looking at the alarm clock on my nightstand. It was almost twelve and the rehearsal was at three.

"Well… Do you really want to waste it talking?" With one long blink of his eyes, I knew I had him.

"Good point…"

"Okay, now when you're walking down the aisle, remember to hold your bouquets up with your elbows out. We want to see smiles from everyone. This is a wedding, not a funeral," Deidra told the wedding party. She was Tracy's aunt and coordinator of the wedding. Her husband would be the minister performing the nuptials.

As Kenneth waited at the front of the church with his brother, Lance, whom was his best men, the bridesmaids and grooms were escorted set by set down the aisle with Deidra right beside them, telling them what they were doing right and wrong. When it was Tracy's turn to walk, you could see the frustration she was gaining from her aunt's relentless criticism and input.

"Tracy, honey, if you walk that slow, you'll bore the guests… Now that is too fast… You don't want to seem eager to get it over with… You're not walking down the aisle to Hip Hop music, why are you bouncing? Not so stiff, relax your shoulders…"

"Aunty, I'm not starting over again!" Tracy finally shouted when she'd been told to start over for the eighth time. She finally moved on to me.

"Your role is to cater to Tracy and still look good doing, Ella. You have to keep your pace with hers and smile at the guests while being careful of her train. We don't want to see a tumbling bride and maid of honor now. Don't hold your bouquet like a weapon. Hold it gracefully – caress it." I don't know what possessed me to do so but I glanced into the pews at Chris on that last sentence and he winked at me. I clamped down on the corner of my bottom lip to prevent any laughter from escaping. "Don't bite your lip, Ella. We're not trying to sell sex in church," she scorned me and I gasped as everyone else laughed.

"That was not a sex face!" I said through laughter.

"How do you know, anyway?" Tracy asked.

"Let's get back to the rehearsal," she flushed.

Rehearsal was supposed to be over at five o'clock but we weren't let go until almost thirty minutes after. We arrived at The State Room Banquet Hall and everyone searched for their place cards. Kenneth's parents wanted everyone to get to know each other so they placed all the cards randomly, making sure everyone was sitting next to someone they didn't know well. Chris, being a last minute add on, he was allowed to sit next to me.

Before dinner was served, Kenneth and Tracy stood and got the attention of the guests.

"We want to thank you all for agreeing to be a part of or helping out some way in the wedding. We couldn't make this day happen without all of you," Kenneth said in his Americanized accent.

"Yes, and I know I've been such a perfectionist so I want to thank you for enduring patience and giving support through it all. We're two days away from being Mr. and Mrs. Kenneth Kerr!" Tracy shouted and everyone cheered. "Now I'm a little tipsy so I'm going to sit down and eat!"

"Enjoy," Kenneth added before they went back to their separate seats.

The dinner was served buffet style with both American and Jamaican cuisines. Most of the food looked delicious but some of the items, I wasn't willing to try. I wasn't ready to try goat no matter how much curry it was covered in. There was also a brown stew that didn't look too attractive. I watched in amazement as Chris filled up on coco bread. I didn't see an ounce of fat anywhere on his body. Except maybe his ass…

"What are you smiling about?" he asked, snapping me out of my reverie.

"Nothing," I said quickly.

"Keeping secrets is a bad start to any relationship," he told me while attempting and failing at keeping a straight face.

"I was thinking about your ass but if you're referring to earlier… It being the start of a relationship is why I won't tell you." His face screwed up as he tried to let it sink in.

"Huh?" he said finally.

"Stay clueless," I said with a smile before leaning over to kiss his cheek.

"Do we need to separate you two?" Tracy butted in from across the table.

"Hater," I coughed.

"Yeah, I might have separation anxiety," Chris said, wrapping his arms around me. As I turned, prepared to stick my tongue out at Tracy, I saw Naomi at the table behind her. She was eyeing Chris with a look that could've shot daggers across the table at him. I looked at Chris and he was giving Tracy one of his boyish smiles, unaware of the staring.

"You two were made for each other. Ella used to pull that smile on me in high school when she wanted me to do her math homework," Tracy told him.

"I was coming to you for help!" I replied, momentarily forgetting about Naomi.

"How was it helping when you knew it already!"

I tried to come up with a response but nothing came to me. "So you said you work at the bank with Kenneth and Tracy?" I said to Theo, the guy sitting next to me, who was one of Kenneth's groomsmen.

"Hey, I hope you're not mad about Chris," Tracy pulled me aside after the dinner and said.

"Oh, no… He's mad at me though… Well was," I told her with a devious grin.

"You freaks! You know, I was watching him during the rehearsal. He looked like he was imagining you with a different title."

"Don't even start with the foolishness," I replied with a snort.

I looked over at Chris who was busy conversing with Michael, Kenneth, and Lance.

"Oh, to be a fly on their shoulders…" Tracy said after seeing where my attention went.

Chris looked up as he laughed and caught us looking at him. I saw him excuse his self and then he walked over to us.

"Thanks for inviting me to all of this, Tracy. I enjoyed myself and ate good!" he said, rubbing his stomach.

"Of course! We're like family now. Just think of me as the almost albino sister," she told him and we laughed.

"I used to tell people she was adopted when she went with us on family trips," I informed him.

"Awe, so y'all really did grow up as sisters?"

"Yep!" we said in unison.

"So go easy on her… She prefers worrying about others than them worrying about her. Uncle Sammie will tell you how to deal with her," she leaned forward and whispered conspiratorially to him before walking off to join her fiancé. I stared at her retreating back through narrowed eyes.

"You can't kill her before the wedding," Chris said, wrapping his arms around me. I looked up at his face with my bottom lip poked out.

"Can I pinch her at least?"

"No!"

"Fine! So I noticed you having a conversation with my brother…"

"I know…"

"What were y'all talking about?" I asked casually and he grinned.

"Nope… It's a man thing, woman!"

"I hate you."

"No you don't."

"I dislike you."

"Sometimes, but not now."

"I want a kiss."

"Always got one for you," he said before obliging. "Are you ready to go?"

"Whenever you are, but shouldn't we say something?"

"I guess so…" I said with a sigh. He let me go to grab my hand and walked back to the crowd. We said our farewells to everyone then made our way towards the exit, where I ran into Naomi smoking a cigarette.

"We'll see you in two days," I said to her. Chris gave a smile and nod to agree.

"Nice seeing you again, bye," Naomi said quickly then fished her phone out of her hand purse before walking off.

"Was she that…that first time I met her?" Chris asked. I understood the lost words.

"No, this bitchy attitude is new to me as well."

"Oh… What's her problem?"

"I have no idea and don't care…" I said as he opened my door and I got in.

I went home and was finally able to relax – at least after Chris went to sleep. I watched him as he slept and smiled to myself. I still couldn't believe he belonged to me. That he was in my town, in my apartment, in my bedroom, in my bed. This was a living dream I didn't want to wake up from and as I finally drifted, I didn't have any nightmares.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Waking up the next morning, I was surprised to feel so rested and relaxed. I looked over at Chris and he was still asleep on his back with his body stretched out. Thank God I had a queen sized bed. He looked as if he hadn't slept so comfortably in days. After coming out of the bathroom, I decided that I'd make breakfast.

After scanning through the fridge and cabinets, I settled on French toast, scrambled eggs, sausages and hash patties.

"I thought I woke up in IHOP," Chris said a few feet behind me, making me jump. I almost spilled orange juice on the counter.

"How does your tall ass not make any noises when you move?" He was in his boxers and a tank top.

"Oh, you expect me to stomp around, hitting door ceilings and walls? I feel like I'm being discriminated against," he said with mock anger.

"Sit down and shut up," I said as I put the glasses of orange juice near the plates on the kitchen table.

"You better had fixed me some breakfast!" he said as he sat down, making me laugh.

"We're going to fight…"

"Naked?" His eyes lit up as if that's really what I meant.

"Eat!" I shouted as I sat down.

"Dang woman," he said picking up his fork. My upper body shook with inner laughter.

After eating a second helping before I finally finished my first, he stood up and collected the dishes. Instead of putting them in the dishwasher, I watched in awe as he hand washed them.

"I could get used to this…" I said, folding my arms.

"You've seen me wash dishes before."

"Not a whole set. I've seen you rinse them and put them in the dishwasher. This is much sexier." He looked back at me with indecision.

"I don't know if I should be flattered or feel like a piece of meat," he said finally.

"Both, baby…"

"Okay," he said with a head nod. I was about to sit back in the chair but suddenly sensed danger and jumped up. I made it to the edge of the dining room before he caught me and splashed the front of my shirt with warm water.

"I knew it!" I shouted as I snatched the cup, threw the remainder of the water on him, and ran around the couch.

I thought he would chase me around the couch and I'd have a chance to run but he jumped on the couch, causing me to freeze and shriek. He jumped down and grabbed me into his arms before running to the bedroom and tossing me on the bed. I immediately bounced up and jumped on him, causing us both to fall on the bed. I tried to flip over but he was too strong and pinned me down, gathering my wrists in one hand as he planted one leg on either side of me.

"Chris, don't tickle me again!" I pleaded, knowing what was coming.

"You called me a piece of meat," he said as he tickled my sides and I shrieked with laughter.

"I didn't mean it!" I shrieked again as he tickled my underarms.

"Apologize!"

"Chris, I'm going to pee on myself!" I tried to buck him off but it was too much body on me.

"Then apologize!"

"Chris, please!"

After getting a few more shrieks of laughter from me he finally let my arms go and I punched his stomach.

"Jerk! How do you know my spots anyway?" He glared at me as if to answer would be a waste of breath. "Never mind," I said and he grinned as he got off of me. I leaned over and bit his cheek.

"Ow! You damn vampire!" He yelled, holding his cheek.

"That's the neck… I can bite that too." I laughed as indecision crossed his features again. "You got me good… I'm getting cold," I said, sitting up to remove my shirt.

"Breakfast and sex? I'm moving in!" he said, sitting up as well. I knew he was joking but my stomach lurched at the idea.

"I'm going to warm myself up in the shower before I catch a cold. I have bride watching duties tonight."

"Oh yeah… So what does this stripper really look like?" he asked, raising his knees towards his chest and resting his arms on his knees.

"Are you going to Kenneth's party?" I countered.

"Well they did invite me…"

"Is that what y'all were laughing about?" I don't know why I felt a bit insecure asking the question.

"No. We were laughing about you." Well that was an unexpected response.

"Me? What about me?"

"Don't worry about it," he said, ruffling my hair before getting up. "Let's go shower."

"What? No… Tell me…"

"You're going to catch a cold…"

"I want to know!" I whined.

"It wasn't exactly about you… It was about me but it had to do with… It contained information concerning you," he stuttered. The fact that he had trouble getting the sentence out made my eyes almost squint to a close. What was making him so nervous in front of me to say but laugh amongst them?

"Do I even want to know?"

"Don't matter because I'm not telling. Let's go," he said, holding his hand out for me to grab. I knew from his tone that the discussion was over so I took his hand without another word.

"I got an awkward feeling about tonight…" I said to Chris as I stood outside my car with him.

"What, you don't trust me?" he asked with his eyebrows raised.

"I'm not talking about you - I do… I meant here." I pointed at the hotel entrance. He was dropping me and Tracy off at the bachelorette party before heading to Kenneth's.

"You think the stripper is going to try something?" I saw his jawline set and his lower cheeks twitch. Tracy turned and rummaged through her purse to hide her smile.

"Chris, calm down!" I said with a laugh.

"Okay. Let's go make sure y'all make it in safe…" He said, grabbing my elbow and I snatched it back.

"He's not even here yet! Go with the guys!" I said as Tracy laughed.

"I'll make sure she's on her best behavior," Tracy told him.

"Excuse you!" I interjected. "Look, I will see you later… Can I have a few ones though?" The expression on his face made Tracy me both burst out in laughter.

"Nah, see… Both of you get your asses back in the car! We're going home!"

"I'm joking!" I said, trying to control my laughter as I placed my hands on his shoulder. He responded by putting his arms around my waist.

"You better be… Let me get out of here before somebody thinks I'm a sucker." He knelt down and gave me a kiss on my forehead, my nose, and then my lips. He tried to back up but I grabbed his face again.

"Do you two want to go in and get a room?" Tracy asked.

"Okay, we're going in for real. Don't have too much fun," I warned with my index finger.

"You either. See you in the morning."

We finally made our way into the Waterfront Hotel and half of the ladies were already there. I'd already came by earlier to decorate the room and bring our wedding gear since we were staying overnight.

When Tracy entered the room, she understood why I didn't want Chris to escort us inside. The room decorated with penis party lights, a center piece, and confetti on the table as well as on the dining ware sets. There were banners and streamers on the wall that read "Bachelorette Party" in shades of pink, blue, and purple. One of the walls also contained a blown up photo of Tracy that was taken the week before she met Kenneth. As the guest of honor, Tracy had to put on a "Bride To Be" sash and tiara that matched the decorations.

After mingling and dining for a bit, I got one of the games started.

"Okay girls… It's time to play a game!" I shouted to get everyone's attention. "The first game we're going to play is called "Taste Test". Now in these disposable coffee cups is a concoction of a mixed alcoholic drink. Everyone will get one with a pad and paper. You have to identify what's in it. The person who identifies the most gets a lovely prize. You can taste and smell it all you want within a three minute time frame. Start when I blow my whistle," I explained. After handing out the items to all the girls, I put on my penis shaped whistle and blew it. I sipped on the concoction myself as I waited for the timer to buzz.

We laughed as we watched the girls' methods of deciphering the ingredients. Some gargled with it like mouthwash, some swished it around in their mouths, some swallowed large quantities, and some sipped repeatedly. I chose this as the ice breaker game to get everyone tipsy and it was working quickly.

After a winner was chosen and given a fifty dollar gift card from Victoria's Secret. The next game was for Tracy. I asked Kenneth some personal and simple questions then quizzed her on the answers. For every one she got wrong, she had to drink eight ounces of water before she could open one of her shower gifts. I figured it'd be a way to make sure she was sober for her wedding and it'd be funny to see her go to the bathroom every five minutes.

The final game of the night was "The Panty Game". I had all the women buy a pair of panties in Tracy's size but in a style that they usually wore. The ladies then had to guess which panties belonged to whom. The winner got a Victoria's Secret gift basket.

When the stripper arrived, he gave me his boom box with his iPod to set up for him as he got ready inside the bathroom. I was to wait for his knock as queue that he was ready. I turned off the music we had on and pressed play on his boom box. "What's Your Fantasy" by Ludacris blasted from it and the women instantly got ready for the show.

"Ladies and sluts of the night… I hope you brought some dollars with you because we got some entertainment for you! The feature presentation of the night! The oh so sexy, so tall, so masculine, and so dangerously sweet! Mr. Chocolate Thunder!" I held the door open and he entered the room.

"Hello gorgeous ladies. I hope you don't mind me crashing the party but I heard there was a wedding tomorrow and I came with a special gift for the bride to be," he said in his deep baritone with a grin on his face.

"She's right of there!" Naomi shouted with a slight slur. I glanced at Tracy and she was staring at Chocolate Thunder with her mouth slightly parted. Her eyes glazed over his body in his black leather pants, black tank top, and long black trench coat.

Naomi made Tracy sit in a chair and Chocolate Thunder walked over to her, removing the coat which revealed his butt cheeks through the cutouts of his pants. As he gyrated, popped, and removed clothes, the ladies went wild, tossing their bills in the air to get in on some of the action. By the time Trey Songz "Panty Droppa" came on, the ladies were almost out of bills and he was in nothing but a thong with a hammock for his penis. I tried to stay away from him all night but one of the ladies held me down as he sat in my lap and made me run my hands across his abs. I must say that I was in awe of how he easily picked up Vicky, who was tall and thick, and flipped her by the legs before gracefully placing her back into her seat.

By the time he left, the ladies were in need of more drinks and dry panties. I knew once they went home, a few booty calls would be made. Even I was regretting the fact the Chris would be going back to my place after he left the bachelor party.

Once the ladies got their senses back, we enjoyed a cake shaped like a pink and black corset with a golden "K" placed on the crotch. The party was great and everyone enjoyed themselves. Until I passed out the party favors…

"I am loving this!" Katie, one of Tracy's bridesmaids said as she rummaged through the bag. "Penis candy is a double treat!" She held up the penis pops and bite sized milk chocolate penises.

"X-rated fortune cookies? I can't wait to open this…" Kim said with excitement.

"Oh and she added condoms and lube. These are about to get used tonight after that show!" Vicky said, fanning herself.

"I knew some of you Filthy McNasty women would need them," I told her as I opened one of the treats from my own bag.

"Like you and Mr. Chris Brown haven't been getting it in nonstop…" Naomi said with a snort.

"Um, excuse me?" I replied, taken aback by her tone.

"Girl please. Save that innocent act for a stranger… Don't try to act like you ain't letting him slide up in that every time his dick rises…" She said with a laugh before sipping the drink in her hand.

I sat up straight before speaking, "Don't confuse me and him with you and your random dude of the moment, Naomi. Just because _your_ thong is never on anything but the damn floor doesn't mean that's how the rest of us function in relationships."

"Relationship? A couple trips back and forth to fuck doesn't make it a relationship. That just makes you a pricey whore," she spit at me with venom on her tongue. I heard Tracy gasp beside me.

"If that's the case, what the hell does it make you! Only thing you get from a man is a sperm deposit! Instead of worrying about what somebody's doing to my vagina, stop trying to use yours to trap a rich man because they don't want you!"

"And you think Chris Brown is going to stick around after he done busted enough nuts!" I saw her prepare to stand so I stood too and instantly felt a pair of hands on my arms.

"Well at least he leaves his nuts in the trash can… Don't your men make sure they flush theirs or that you swallow?" I watched as anger mixed with shock in her face. She'd told me the information in confidence but I was so upset about her throwing my own insecurities in my face that it sent me over the edge. "Let me go," I murmured with my eyes closed, not sure who was holding on to me. I felt them hesitate before doing so and I went straight into the closed off bedroom.

The moment the door shut, the tears silently flowed. I couldn't believe what just took place. With one of my best friends of eleven years… I knew there was animosity and distance but I didn't expect the big blow up. Especially the night before our best friend's wedding. I suddenly felt even worse. _Why couldn't this wait until after the wedding? _I thought to myself, but why did it even have to happen at all? I guess I knew what her problem was though.

All the time I've known her, she's had this dream of being a famous trophy wife. She wanted to marry rich so she'd never have to lift a finger and never have to earn her own money. She talked about how she wanted a kid to make sure she was taken care of for life. We used to think she was joking but over the years we watched as she attempted to make this dream a reality. She went to clubs with her other gold digging friends in search of famous men to bait with her looks and body and I just happened to stumble across Chris… In a night club…

I knew I shouldn't but I was beginning to feel sorry and horrible. Like I'd taken her dream… No wonder she was mad at me. I bet she even gave Chris's friend her number to give to him but he saw that Chris liked me so he kept it. Ugh! A feeling of sickness is lurching in my stomach.

"Ella?" Tracy called as she knocked on the door. I didn't answer. "Ella please? Let me in. Everyone's left… Ella?" she called with a little more urgency. I got off the bed and unlocked the door. I was expecting only Tracy but as the door swung open completely, Naomi appeared a few feet behind her on the couch. I immediately wiped my face and my anger grumbled in my chest. When she glanced towards the door, I saw a stream of tears on her cheeks and mine began to fall again.

"Look at you two idiots," Tracy said as she shook her head. "Fighting like enemies instead being friends… What the hell is wrong with you guys!" Not willing to talk first, I leaned against the door frame and folded my arms. As the silence stretched and I saw Tracy ready to pull her hair out, I finally spoke.

"I didn't mean to say what I said… I was upset and… I apologize if you have a problem with me seeing Chris."

"What!" Tracy's head snapped up in disbelief. "Are you drunk too because what you just said is completely ridiculous. Tell her, Naomi." The silence stretched again. "That's what your problem has been all this time? I thought it was because I chose Ella as my maid of honor – not over Chris!"

"Really, Tracy…" I said, finally looking at her.

"I know it was a no brainer and I officially asked you when I got engaged but… I thought it was getting to her now that it was here. Over Chris?" she muttered to herself, trying to grasp at the real issue.

"It was supposed to be me… It was my idea to go to L.A. in the first place," Naomi finally spoke. "Why didn't he see me? I'm the pretty one…"

Another flare of anger… I was about to say something else I may regret but Tracy put her hand on my shoulder.

"Do you even hear yourself? You're so wrapped up in this blanket of jealousy that you can't even see the real picture or how much you're hurting a very good friend. Something special happened to Ella… The same thing that happened to me... She found someone she really loves," –she looked me in the eyes—"Even if she won't admit it to herself yet. You haven't even been there as a friend for her to know of the pain she's been experiencing being away from him. Or noticed how happy she is just to be in the same room with him. These are moments we're all supposed to be sharing as friends but you've let it drive a wedge between you two…"

I barely heard anything she said towards the end. I was still stuck on me loving Chris. I did… How the hell did that happen so fast? And what she said about pain… She was right about that too. The dreams and the stress went away the moment I heard his voice in my ear. What is wrong with me? Why is he under my skin like this? This can't be normal or healthy.

"I can't help it," I heard Naomi mutter.

"Well it better be fixed and fixed before the morning or there will be no wedding! I don't want to walk down that aisle to my future husband with this crap in my head! Fix it!" Tracy shouted before walking past me into the room and flopping down on the bed.

I realized as I felt the dryness that my mouth was hanging open. Turning my head towards Naomi, I saw that she had the same expression as me. I walked away from the door and sat on one of the chairs.

"What did I do to you?" I asked, looking down at my intertwined fingers.

"I don't know…" she replied.

"Do you think this hasn't been a shock for me either? That I haven't been scratching my head wondering why he chose me that night and why he's still around… I don't even know how I fell so fast. Jumping without knowing if there's a safety net beneath me has never been my thing but somehow I just did it and now I'm not sure of what's below me… I've always envied you."

"Me? Why me?" she asked with her eyes bulged.

"I've never been able to just date or have a good time with a guy. I always end up alone with a broken heart to mend."

"I don't like being like this… Being a whore…"

"You're not a whore."

"I am… I say I collect boyfriends or that I'm being a player but I'm the only one getting played. They move on and settle down without even thinking about me… Just like you and Tracy are going to do…"

"Idiot!" Tracy shouted from the bedroom, making us both jump. I'd forgotten she was there. When she came out, she walked right over to Naomi and shook her by the shoulders. "Idiot!" she shouted again.

I was going to jump up and grab her but before I even realized it, I was laughing. I was soon joined by Naomi, then Tracy, and just like that the fighting was over.

Even though we were back to being friends again, what Naomi said about Chris stuck in my head. It kept replaying like a skipping CD as I laid in bed trying to fall asleep. Tracy and Naomi had already gone. I heard his ringtone play as my phone went off on the night stand but I ignored it. A few minutes went by and there was a text. I didn't even get up to read it. I closed my eyes and waited to drift.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

I felt like I'd just closed my eyes when the sound of someone knocking woke the three of us.

"Oh my gosh… Make them stop!" Tracy mumbled, putting a pillow over her face.

"I got it," I told her as I sat up.

"Today's the big day!" Francis yelled. She kissed my cheek as she walked into the hotel room with bags filling her hands. "You girls are still sleeping? It's time to get ready!"

"Mom! The wedding is at three-thirty and the church is practically around the corner! It's almost nine and the glam squad won't be here until eleven!" Tracy yelled from the bedroom.

"Well excuse me for being a little over-excited! Well I'm here now… Is Angela coming over?" Francis turned to me and asked.

"No, she'll be going to the church later," I told her with an amused look on my face. Naomi had just walked out of the room with Tracy and her pajama pants were on backwards.

"What happened last night? Just how drunk did you ladies get?" Francis asked when she saw what had my attention. I shifted in my seat at the remembrance.

"I'm very sober… Trust me," Tracy said, shooting a look at me before sitting down. "But my bladder may have grown in size." Naomi and I laughed as Tracy explained the "Groom Quiz" game to her mother.

"And you got them wrong?"

"She asked him about things no one would think of to ask! I would never think to ask or pay attention to which hand he uses to grab bread out of the package!" Now her mother was joining in on the laughter.

"Well… I brought fruit salad and Mimosas. That should get you girls on your feet and ready. I'll start cleaning… Are there cocks on the wall?" she asked as she stood. After the shock wore off, we were laughing like school girls.

After the quick breakfast, I finally checked my phone. Three missed calls and two texts. All from Chris…

_**Y won't you pick up?**_

_**Can u at least reply to my text and let me know ur OK? Don't make me worry!**_

I began to tap his name to call him but I quickly hit the "end" button. I wasn't ready to talk to him. Insecurity and doubt were still pulling on my heartstrings. I knew I would see him at the wedding but I needed a little more time.

Time seemed to be going by fast. The bridesmaid arrived at the hotel to get their hair and make-up done. The bridesmaids and I had our hair done in side-swept curls with loose curls in the front. Tracy's hair was barrel curled and placed into a loose updo with curls cascading down the sides. By two–thirty we were driving to the church to put on our wedding attire and walk down the aisle. The moment we set foot in the back room, I saw the nerves begin to set in Tracy.

The bridesmaids were dressed in satin strapless dresses with a pleated chiffon bodice. The color Tracy chose was called Rose Petal.

My dress was a tiered organza ball gown in the same color that linked the bridal and bridesmaids dresses together. After getting my dress on, I went into the private room to prepare Tracy for the big reveal to the ladies.

Tracy walked out in her wedding dress and everyone's mouths dropped. It was a strapless white dot tulle ball gown with a ruffled skirting pattern from the waist down.

"You look so beautiful!" Francis said as she dabbed at her eyes with tissue.

"Like a Barbie," Naomi added and the girls agreed.

"We have necklaces for you guys to wear," I told them as I walked over to my little suitcase and pulled out a bag. I handed all five bridesmaids a box that contained a crystal rhinestone graduated necklace with matching earrings. Tracy and I would be wearing the same set. After everyone put theirs on, I pulled out another box.

"What's this?" Tracy asked as I handed it to her.

"Open it."

"Oh my gosh," she whispered as she opened the long, velvet laced box. It was a charm bracelet that included all the good luck charms. For something old, there were the best friend pendants we'd gotten in the eighth grade. For the something new, there was a knotted circle charm that represented her and Kenneth's lives being tied together. For something borrowed, I added the horseshoe charm from the bracelet my father gave me on my sixteenth birthday. For the something blue, there was a charm shaped like an eye with a blue stone in the middle to match Tracy's eyes. "I'm going to need a Kleenex," she said as she fanned her eyes and her mother handed her one.

"I knew it slipped your mind so I thought of a way to add them in my gift to you," I told her as I clasped it on to her wrist.

"Thank you so much. Everything is perfect now. Thank you for everything. I couldn't have done this without you by my side," she said as she embraced me. We were careful not to touch our faces against skin or touch each other's hair.

"Where else would I be?"

"Enough! Now I need tissue!" Naomi shouted, dabbing at the corner of her eyes.

"Ten minutes, ladies!" Deidra entered the room and said.

"Oh! My veil!" Tracy said and I rushed to get it.

After applying the elbow length veil with the crystal leaf tiara to her head, she looked at herself in the mirror and her eyes bulged.

"I'm getting married…" she said in a low but surprised voice.

"You're getting married!" we all shouted back.

Spending the last minutes on touch-ups and attempting to relax our nerves, we grabbed our bouquets which contained: tiger lilies, delphinium, rose buds, double babies breath, ivy and ribbons. The music began to play as we lined up outside the double doors with our partners, dressed in black suits with white cummerbunds, and Tracy stood behind me with her dad. When it was my turn to go, I put my hand on Lance's awaiting arm, held up my bouquet as instructed, and marched down the aisle with a smile. I tried to avoid making eye contact with Chris as I passed his pew but I could see him from my peripheral and my smile almost faltered at the look on his face. Confusion mixed with anger.

Once Lance and I made it to the front of the church, the music changed into Mendelssohn's "Wedding March" and the church stood… As Tracy walked down the aisle with her dad, there was a sort of warm glow that emanated from her. I glanced over at Kenneth and his bottom lip was trembling. By the time Tracy made it to him, there were tears in his eyes. John handed his daughter over to Kenneth with one last hug before she'd take on another man's name.

As the rest of the ceremony commenced and the vowels were exchanged, more tears flowed from my eyes as they flowed from Tracy's. She was really marrying her soul mate. Her partner for life… I turned my head slightly to get a better view of the crowd and saw Chris's eyes glued to me. His stare took the breath out me as I got caught up in some sort of wavelength of an electric current. I turned my focus back to the ceremony but I could still feel the buzz in the air and knew he was still watching me.

Once the couple said "I do", they were soon declared husband and wife. They shared a kiss as everyone clapped in celebration before they turned towards the crowd and jumped over the broom Lance placed in front of their feet. It was done. My best friend was a married woman.

As everyone made their way out of the church hall over to the banquet hall, I felt a hand coil around my arm. I didn't need to hear the voice or see the face to know who it was.

"Are you purposely avoiding me?" Chris muttered in my ear. I looked up at his face but no response came to me. "I need to talk to you."

"I have to take pictures with the wedding party in ten minutes."

"I only need five." He said, escorting me to the bathroom and locking the door. I stared at the lock after he removed his hand away from it then finally looked at him. He had an unreadable expression on his face and this made me more nervous than the face I saw in the church. I also took notice to how good he looked in his charcoal suit. He wore a solid white shirt beneath it with the top button undone and no tie. The diamond studs in his ear with the gold bracelet and watch added extra appeal to it. My insides were blazing in emotional and physical confusion.

"Did something happen last night with that stripper?"

"No!" I shouted out of shock. The question was so unexpected.

"Do you think I cheated?"

"No."

"Then why have you been ignoring me?" His voice was mixed with relief and exasperation.

I couldn't deny this one and I didn't want to talk about it at the moment, "Can we talk about this later?"

"No, I need some answers now. What happened?" he asked with a stern look.

"I don't have time to explain it right now, Chris. Can't we just go enjoy the reception?" I was beginning to feel claustrophobic being locked in the bathroom and my emotions were slithering up my sleeve, ready to break free. Just then, there was a knock on the door and I rushed pass him to open it.

"Here you are! I thought you two left." It was Naomi.

"No, I'm coming now," I told her with a nervous glance at Chris.

"Okay. The newlyweds are still taking their pictures so we have some time." She began to walk out but stopped and turned towards Chris. "Oh, by the way… I'm sorry for acting like a bitch towards you and Ella. I hope she told you I didn't mean the things about you using her and the other women. I was drunk and jealous but we've made up now. Well you two get back to your talk," she in a rapid speed before walking out of the bathroom. I stared at her fleeting curls with wide eyes.

Chris slowly turned his head towards me and his anger had me cowering on the inside. Damn Naomi! Chris closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and index finger before speaking.

"I don't understand… What do I have to do to keep from having to verbally assure you that I want you and only you? I've even asked you to move in with me. Why would I do that if there were other females? You were with me twenty-four seven for two weeks straight, we talk at least twice a day – texting in between, and I'm here right now…" He finally opened his eyes and looked at me. "What more do I have to do, Ella? I'm about ready to go crazy!"

"I'm sorry," I muttered. "I'm trying…"

"Were you trying when you were ignoring me? Because it sounds like running to me..."

"I wasn't running from you. I was running from my own self because-." I stopped before I said it out loud. I wasn't sure I was ready to say it.

"Because what?" I blinked at him and kept my mouth closed. I could feel the fear rising to the surface. When his face quickly turned from frustration to concern and he rushed over to me, putting his arms around my waist, I knew he could too. "What is it, Ella? Tell me," he demanded.

"Because I love you…" As I said it, I felt the tears fall. "I don't know how it happened so fast but I do and now I'm afraid because all of this is new and I don't know where it's going to go. Then there's the long distance and us being in two completely different worlds and I don't how you feel so I'm-," I rushed out but before I could finish, his lips were crushing against mine with a passionate urgency that took my breath away.

Within seconds, my passion matched his as a want and need for him filled me. Every current in my body was alive and racing at a speed that could induce cardiac arrest. When he finally separated his lips from mine, we were both panting and his eyes were gleaming.

"I love you too," he saidd as a huge, teeth-bearing grin formed on his face.

"You do?" My insides are doing somersaults and cartwheels.

"Yes! I realized it the day you told me you were leaving – maybe even before then. The idea of you getting on a plane and flying away from me put an ache in my heart. It's been with me until I came here… Like you took a part of it with you and I'd come home to it."

Is it possible to float without leaving the ground? I was thankful he was holding me because I don't think I could've stood on my own after his declaration. I am speechless and all I want to do is feel our bodies connected again so I reach for his face and he lowers to grace me with his lips again and I melt. He lifted me so that our faces are on the same level and my wrap one arm around his neck, pulling him even closer to me. I don't want to let this man go. A soft moan travels from my mouth into his and his arms tighten around me as desire feels us both.

We both hear a cough as someone approaches the door and he quickly lets me down before they open it. I try to step back but he pulls me back and grabs my hand.

"Hello, excuse us," he says as one of Kenneth's female wedding guests walk in and pauses. I think it's one of his cousins. We quickly rush out of the bathroom to give her privacy, displaying identical grins.

"Thank God for smudge proof make-up," I mutter and Chris laughs softly. "I better go freshen up before the photos."

"Okay," he says but doesn't move or let my hand go and I laugh.

"I meant right now."

"I'm working on it," he responds with a grin before leaning down and planting a soft kiss on my lips.

"Well maybe one more." I caught his face before he pulled back.

"You're giving me impure thoughts in church," he said after obliging and I giggle like a school girl.

"I'll see you inside," I said, backing away before turning.

The reception hall was beautiful with decorations of white and rose petal. The centerpieces were heart shaped vases with orchids floating in water beneath candles. Silk rose petals, crystals and personalized bottles of bubbles scattered the tables amongst the glasses and dinnerware. The linen and chairs followed the same rose petal and white theme. Sheer fabric draped the walls behind dimmed lights, creating a romantic fairytale setting. The room already featured gorgeous chandeliers and a painted ceiling.

As I walked in and made my way to my seat at the head table with the wedding party, I searched for Chris. I made sure he was at one of the front tables with my family. He was sitting next to my father, engrossed in rapid conversation – both with big smiles on their faces. I smiled as I wondered what they were talking about. Spotting me before I climbed the steps, Chris quickly stood and rushed over to me, holding his hand out for me to grab.

"Let me help you to your seat," he said with a slight bow of his head.

"Thank you, Mr. Brown," I replied cordially as he led me up the four steps and to my seat. He pulled out my chair for me and gave me a kiss on the cheek before heading back to his seat.

"Oh, he's a gentleman too?" Naomi asked after he'd gone.

"Sometimes," I responded with a grin.

"Ooh, y'all nasty!" she whispered loudly and I laughed.

Just then, Deidra caught our attention as she spoke through the microphone in front of the DJ booth. My brain instantly sent flashes in front of my eyes of the night at the club when I first saw Chris in person. A huge smile grew from ear to ear at the memory. I looked down at Chris and saw the same stupid grin on his face. He glanced over at me and quickly turned his head as his body shook with silent laughter. I let out a giggle and bit against my bottom lip to control any more from escaping.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, Mr. and Mrs. Kenneth Kerr!" Deidra shouted. I missed her speech.

Everyone stood and clapped as the newlyweds made their way past the crowd, mouthing their appreciations. They stood in the center of the dance floor and the selected music began for them to share their first dance. After taking their seats between me and Lance, we clinked our butter knives against our champagne glasses – a traditional gesture for the couple to kiss.

Salads and appetizers were presented to the tables by the waiting staff and drink orders were taken right after. An expensive bottle of wine was served to the table without anyone ordering and I immediately knew who bought it.

"That man is amazing," Tracy whispered to me after we raised our glasses to him in appreciation. He countered with a slight hand wave. After the entrees were served, the waiters filled the champagne glasses and Lance stood to make his toast to the couple, Tracy cleared her throat as a queue to me to stand and make a toast next.

"I don't want to!" I whispered loudly to her.

"Ella, you know almost everyone here. Stop being so shy!"

"Can't I tell you two in private?" I asked with a sad face and Kenneth laughed before clinking his glass to get everyone's attention.

"I'm sorry, Ella. Tracy told me to do it if you got scared," he responded to my fierce glare. I stood nervously as all eyes in the banquet hall settled on me. Lance handed me the microphone with a smile.

"Um, hello everyone," I mumbled into the microphone.

"Louder!" Naomi shouted before smacking me on my backside, causing the hall to erupt with laughter.

"Thanks for that, Naomi," I scorned. "Well, this is the part where I'm supposed to say some kind words to the bride and groom but none come to me at the moment since they're forcing me to do this." –more laughter—"I've known Tracy for almost my whole life and there was an instant bond there. We were like twins of different shades… Everywhere one was, you knew the other would be there too. We stayed over each other's houses all the time, knew each other's families well, went on family vacations together, and even reunions. We were there for each other's first boyfriends and still there for each other's first heart break… When Tracy started working at Wells Fargo, I went in to give her flowers, was greeted by Kenneth and knew instantly that he was Tracy's type. So when he found out I was her friend and nervously asked me if she was single, I laid the game out thick for him! I spoke about Tracy as if I was her resume and she was acquiring a job in Kenneth's company!" I said and everyone laughed.

"You never told me that!" Tracy said in surprise.

"Oh yes, girl… I got you that job before you even knew it was available," I said to her and everyone laughed again.

"Thank you!" she shouted.

"Back to the toast… Here we are now, three years later, and they're married. I've never seen a couple so close and so happy. Kenneth you are a great man and I'm glad my sister found you. If she loves you, then I love you. You make her happy and I know you will continue to do so the rest of your lives together. Welcome to the family and congratulations. Cheers!"

It was now Kenneth and Tracy's turn to make a speech.

"First of all, we want to thank everyone for celebrating and being a part of our special day. We wouldn't have done this if our families couldn't be here for support," Kenneth spoke. "We also want to thank our best man and maid of honor for the wonderful toasts and all that they've done to ensure we made it here today. They were the backbone of this union and kept us focused and calm from the proposal to the 'I Do'."

"Yes. Thank you two so much. You guys were like angels sent from the wedding gods! And Ella? I thank you for not slapping me silly for treating you like my personal assistant sometimes and having you search all over town for the perfect shoes," Tracy said with her hands in prayer position.

"Don't remind me while I'm drinking," I mumbled as I took a sip of my champagne and Naomi choked on laughter next to me as everyone else laughed too.

"You'll be able to pay me back when you're engaged – if I'm your maid of honor… To everyone else… Enjoy the festivities and thank you again! Cheers!"

"When I'm engaged?" I asked when she sat down and some of the party left to go dance.

"It could be soon…" she said with a smile.

"No… Just no…"

"We'll see… Here comes your future!" She said, looking behind me. I turned and saw Chris making his way towards me.

"Thank you for the bottles of wine. We appreciate it," Kenneth said, standing to greet Chris.

"No problem, man. Just making sure you two have a good time." I loved how he always casually dismissed good deeds as if the gesture was as small as a handshake.

"Come pull a seat up, Chris," Tracy said, preparing to move down so he could sit next to me.

"Oh no, I just came to ask Ella to dance with me," he quickly said before she stood.

"Me? Dance with you? I don't want to embarrass myself, Michael Jackson Jr.," I told him, folding my hands. I had rhythm but it was nothing compared to his skills.

"Stop being a punk and come on!" he said in a mock thug voice, making me laugh.

"My daddy ain't raise no punk!" I said, quickly standing and facing him with a serious face.

"Well bring it on then!"

"Wait, I don't want a challenge," I replied in a small voice while holding on to his arm.

"Come on, lil bits." He grabbed my hand and led me to the dance floor. I got to show off a bit as Keri Hilson's "Turnin' Me On" played. I gyrated against him as I danced with a cocky demeanor to the music. I looked back at him and saw that he had his bottom lip tucked into his mouth. The next song was an old Bay Area favorite. "Cyclone" by Baby Bash… More women made their way to the floor to dance along and show off their moves. As I did the popular move with Tracy and some of the girls we went to school with, Chris stood back and watched with wide eyes. The next song that played was "Teach Me How To Dougie" and all the men on the floor got excited as they took over the floor doing their best rendition. Tracy and I laughed as Kenneth and Chris seemed to have started a battle with each other. The DJ saw this and quickly switched the tunes to a dance mix with a hard beat and floor vibrating baseline. Chris handed me his suit jacket and everyone moved out of the way while the two of them took over the floor, clapping along and cheering. Once they'd had enough, they ended the battle with laughter and a bro hug.

"Bravo, Mr. Brown," I said when he walked over to me.

"Thank you, Ms. Daniels." "Until The End Of Time" by Justin Timberlake began to play and he smiled at me as he grabbed my waist and pulled me closer to him. I put my arms around his neck and we slow danced to the song without saying anything else. Towards the end of the song, "Yo (Excuse Me Miss)" was cut in and we both burst out in laughter.

"No, not the teenaged me…" Chris said, looking slightly embarrassed.

"Hey, I liked this you. You were so adorable and the song is a classic." He blushed at these words and as we danced along, he began to sing the words into my ear.

After the song went off, the music was stopped as the wedding cake was brought out. There were four square shaped tiers of perfection, each layer with a black trim and pearl shaped borders. As each square layer was turned opposite each other, Roses and orchids filled the triangular points. The remainder of the cake featured piped on embellishments and a bride and groom topper finished off the masterpiece. Per a previous threat from Tracy, Kenneth did not smear any of it on her face as they cut the first slice and fed each other. The cake was then moved out of view as it was cut into pieces to be served to the guests.

As I sat with my family for a break and to chat, Chris took Mariah out on the dance floor and twirled her around as she laughed with excitement. Seeing all the fun she was having with him, more little girls gathered around him awaiting their turn. Soon they were joined by women, seeking a dance as well. Chris glanced at me apologetically as he was surrounded by women. A part of me enjoyed the entertainment but another part was ready to march across the room and stake claim.

"Those girls are like vultures," Lauren said as she sat back at the table with Mariah in hand. "They're practically drooling!" My arms fidgeted inside Chris jacket at her words. Lauren was always so blunt and forward.

As if he could sense my uneasiness, Chris walked over and placed a chair directly behind my chair so he could wrap his arms around me.

"I'm getting uncomfortable," he said as he rested his chin on my shoulder.

"Did someone try to touch you?" I asked, trying to keep the wariness out of my tone.

"I love you," he whispered and the green in me was instantly sedated.

Once again, the music was put to a halt as Deidra stood near the DJ booth.

"If I could have all of the unmarried men to the front, please? It's time for the tossing of the garter belt!" I felt Chris stiffen against me. When I looked back at him, he'd already contorted his face into a smile. What was that about?

"I guess that includes me," he said, kissing my cheek before standing.

I laughed as some the men reluctantly made their way to the front where Tracy was sitting in a chair with Kenneth standing behind her. Cabaret music was put on as Kenneth slowly removed the pink garter from Tracy's leg and blindly tossed it behind him. To my utter surprise, Chris expectantly reached out for it but it fell into the hands of Lance. Did I just see disappointment on Chris's face?

The single ladies then rushed to the front of the room like free Louboutin shoes were being given away. Being watched by Chris, and feeling like I may be set up by Tracy, I stood next to Naomi, whom I knew would knock anyone out of the way to catch the bouquet, and sure enough, she leaped for it and caught it midair. I clapped for her as she shook from heel to heel with excitement.

After saying our farewells before the newlyweds were whisked away in a limo, on their way to their honeymoon, all the guests began to clear out, taking with them a wedding favor: chocolate covered apples dressed as the bride and groom. Francis and John packed all of the wedding gifts into Kenneth's truck, which was to be taken back to their home. I gathered all my belongings, slipped into a pair of sandals and headed back to my place with Chris. It was a beautiful day and I enjoyed being around everyone, but since the moment in the bathroom, I was ready to leave.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

With both Tracy and Chris gone, November seemed to take on a new chill. Even Thanksgiving couldn't warm me as it was my only break until the Christmas season and I wouldn't be able to see Chris. After exchanging declarations of love, him being away was driving me crazy. The dreams weren't back but I was still in a small state of distress. It felt like I'd gotten to blow out my candles but just as I was going in for a slice, the cake was taken away. I wanted my cake back!

When December came, Christmas shopping brought a bit of the warmth in me that I was missing. Buying gifts for my loved ones was always a pick-me-up. I'd also be spending it with Chris... Day by day, I slowly ticked off my Christmas list but I couldn't for the life of me figure out what to get for Chris. What do you get the man who already has everything he needs? I decided that I'd attempt to get him to mention or hint at something during our next Skype call but he quickly saw through it.

"I know what you're doing," –he alerted me-"but what I want can't be wrapped in a box."

"What's that?" I asked, completely clueless.

"You… With me…" he replied with a glare.

"Oh…" I murmured. I knew he was speaking in permanent terms. "Is there anything else?"

"Nope." Well a lot of help that was.

"Such a stubborn man you are…"

"I know, but at least it's worth it this time. Don't you enjoy sleeping and waking up to me every day?"

"It still wouldn't be every day… I still have to work for a living."

"You could work for me. A consultant or a stylist..."

"You already have a stylist."

"Who has other clients… You'd just have me, so you can be with me all the time." He was getting more eager with every idea.

"Do you have an answer for everything?"

"Probably," he said with a smile.

"Do you know how annoying that is?"

"I might." Another smile... I let out deep sigh. "Another one of those moments when you want to kick and kiss me at the same time?" I nodded my head and he laughed.

"Don't tell me I could if I was there either," I warned him as I pouted. I didn't want to admit it to him but I loved the thought of moving in with him. I just couldn't see myself doing it. I'd lived with James for eight months and look how that turned out_. But what will happen if you don't move in? _Another part of my brain asked.

"Where did you go?" Chris asked, snapping me out of my head.

"Lost in thought," I said, shaking my head to clear it.

"In what thought?"

"Christmas gifts," I lied.

"What is there to think about?" Tracy asked after I told her and Naomi my dilemma. We were having dinner at Chili's.

"I'm saying… Your lease is up in January too… Perfect timing," Naomi added.

"He's not James, Ella," Tracy said.

"Yes, Chris is actually fun. James was so uptight at times. Everything was about a damn schedule and caution, but what more could you expect from a safety and health inspector?"

"Are you two done with this back and forth? And weren't you two the ones telling me how it was good he didn't act like a little boy, had his life planned out, and didn't do things spontaneously?" I asked through narrowed eyes.

"Well we thought so at first, but he was beginning to change you a bit," Tracy said with a frown.

"Yeah… Even suggesting what you should eat and drink," Naomi added again.

"Funny how at_ that_ time, y'all said he was just looking out for me…" I couldn't help but laugh at the two of them. It's amazing how people bend rules and truth when they believe it's out of love for you. "Can y'all tell me how y'all _really_ feel about Chris?"

"We are!" Tracy said with frustration. "We thought that _maybe_ James was a good match for you and everything he did was out of love but it's different with Chris. Everything is genuine."

"Huh…" I huffed.

"Seriously, Ella... I wouldn't be telling you that you should leave me if I didn't believe it would be a good thing. I can't imagine us not popping up at each other's homes or this… Our girls' night out…"

"Or coming over to eat up your food and tell you about my latest break up," Naomi said.

"Why are you two acting like my bags are packed and it's a done deal? Shut up!"

"Because it should be!" They shouted together.

"My two best friends trying to get rid of me… Wait until I tell-," I began but stopped myself.

"Mm hmm… Look at you," Tracy said with a laugh.

"I need to go to the bathroom. One of you come with me," Naomi said as she stood.

"I'll go. I have to pee too," Tracy said as she slid out of the booth.

"Don't call your man while we're away to talk about us!" Naomi warned as she backed up from the table.

"I will flip your plate over!" I said through laughter.

After the girls disappeared from eyesight, I reached for my purse to check my phone but felt someone standing next to me. Assuming one of them had return and considering our "No calls during dinner" policy, I immediately sat up straight and found myself staring into the chocolate complexioned, brown eyed face of a man I knew very well.

"Ella? I thought that was you," he spoke.

"James… Um, hi…" _Speak of the devil and he will pop up_, I thought. I looked up and down at his tall, slim frame to make sure he was really standing in front of me.

"You look good. Life has been agreeing with you, I see," he said as his eyes glazed over my upper body and face.

"Thank you," I replied in a distracted tone. I was still affected by the awkwardness and wondering what Naomi would say or do when she came back and saw him at our table.

"You're very welcome. So how have you been?"

"I've been well. Blessed…"

"I've heard," he said as he rubbed his index finger and thumb across the thin line of hair on his chin and jaw line. "All of Oakland has heard."

"Heard what?" I knew he was referring to Chris but I didn't know exactly what he was getting at.

"About you and the new company you've been around… So how did you meet him?" he asked, putting his hands in his pants pockets. I knew that he did this when he was anxious.

"We…happened to decide to go to the same place on the same night and the rest you can guess," I told him with a smile. Where the hell were Tracy and Naomi?

"So is this thing serious? I saw he was with you at Tracey's wedding…" Ah… Damn video phones and YouTube.

"Yes it is," I answered honestly.

"But it hasn't been that long, has it? The last time I saw your mother, she said you were still single." What was that, exasperation? Why?

"About three months…" He exhaled and the corner of his lips twitched. "But I love him like it's been three years," I added.

"I see…" he said in a clipped tone. Someone cleared their throat behind me, making him snap out of his thoughts. I knew it was Naomi. "Hello, ladies. Nice to see you…"

"Hmm," Naomi replied.

"Congratulations on your marriage, Tracy," he said, trying to ignore Naomi's glare.

"Thank you," she said with a straight face.

"You're blocking our seats," Naomi informed him, still glaring at him. They were the same height in her heels. I bit back a smile at her blatant rudeness.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said, stepping out of the way. "I just wanted a quick word with Ella. You ladies enjoy the rest of your night. Nice seeing you, Ella." I simply nodded and smiled as he walked away.

"Well the hell did he want?" Naomi asked as she sat down.

"I don't know, to pry, I guess… Took y'all long enough to back," I said, look back and forth at the two.

"Well we saw him squirming so we thought you were telling him you and Chris were engaged or something," Tracy said. I laughed at the hope in her voice.

"I don't need to lie to him, but thanks for making me suffer the awkward moment alone!" I scorned.

"You'll get over it," Naomi said with a wave. "I'll buy you a drink."

I went back home that night with a lot to process. I thought my friends would tell me it was too soon and it'd be a mistake but they were practically pushing me out of town. I guess I wanted them to do the opposite so I could say they were right and tell Chris it was too soon without feeling guilty. I couldn't ask my dad because he'd only tell me to follow my heart, but her compass seemed to be broken at this time. Or maybe my mind was causing it to stick. My mother and I never discussed matters like this but I already knew I wouldn't want to hear her opinion anyway. She'd find a way to piss me off and down talk Chris. Why was he so damn adamant about me living and traveling with him? Did we even know each other well enough to be shacking up? Yes, I love him and couldn't even fathom the idea of us not being together but moving in – to another city at that, was a huge step. Just how far did that safety net stretch?

Still debating and downright stressing over what to get for Chris, I'd started traveling to stores in my free time and just roaming the aisles with hopes that something would shoot an ingenious spark to my brain. I'd even bought him a few gifts already but felt like they weren't enough. We'd agreed upon a one gift ruling – well I set it and he reluctantly agreed upon it.

I knew if I didn't set any grounds, I would've walked into his L.A. apartment and thought I'd walked into a gifting plant. I tried to set a spending limit as well but he put his foot down. The thought of what he'd buy with that one gift limit was frightening. I was praying it wasn't expensive jewelry or something as outlandish as a new car. All this caused even more anxiety.

Back at the Westfield Centre in San Francisco, I was window shopping once again for Chris, checking if the stores brought in anything new. After thirty minutes of walking, I became dissatisfied and headed over Union Square. I'd already gotten him two gifts from one of the pricey stores on the street but one more try couldn't hurt. Disappointed again, I walked back to my car in a bad mood and a need for coffee. What I saw when I walked out of Starbucks sent a creative spark to me and I was smiling from ear to ear as I thought of Chris's reaction to it. I headed home, ready to get my special gift for him prepared.

Excitedly rushing up the stairs to my apartment, I missed the black Hyundai Sonata parked in one of the guest parking stalls, so I was caught off guard and yelped when I saw James watching me as he leaned over the railing.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I asked him as I cupped my throat. He let out a soft laugh before speaking.

"I've been watching you since you pulled up. Something seems to have you happily occupied," he said as he stood straight. He was wearing gray slacks, a white button down, a navy tie and hard shell boots. He must have come over straight from work.

"That's a matter of someone else's business and doesn't explain what you're doing here," I spoke with insolence.

"You got it," he said, throwing his hands up in defeat. "I only came over to apologize. I know I was a bit inquisitive and prying the last time I saw you… I had no right…"

"Okay, why are you showing up at my home a week after the matter though?" I sat my bags against the door and waited with my arms folded. If he was waiting for me to let him in, he'd truly lost his mind…

"I… Wanted to do it while I had the chance," he replied, tucking his hands in his pants pocket. My eyes narrowed for a nanosecond as an agitating thought formed in my head.

"Chance, huh? Have you run into my mother again?" I questioned. I could hear the soft inhale before he clamped his lips shut as he wondered if he should tell the truth or not.

"I might've had a brief chat with her," he muttered as he fiddled with his car keys in his pocket.

"And what exactly did you two discuss?" I was getting more heated by the second.

"Not much. Your name just happened to pop up and she mentioned you were thinking about leaving," he told me as he shifted from foot to foot. He was holding back a lot of information.

"I see…" I was going to have a talk with my mother. "I thank you for your apology and all is forgiven…from the situation," I added as his eyes slightly widened. I knew he was thinking about his cheating.

"Oh, well… Thank you." Things were suddenly awkward again. Making it even worse, Chris's ringtone was going off on my phone and I gasped, feeling as if I was caught in some act. "I guess I should go now," James said, glancing at my purse. Without another word, he walked past me and jogged down the steps towards his car.

I quickly took my phone out of the front of my purse and answered it as I opened my door and gathered my bags. I felt the need to separate the two although Chris was miles away.

Finally on Christmas vacation, I began to pack for my trip with my stomach in knots and butterflies floating around. This Christmas would be special and like no other I've experienced before. I was officially done with my shopping and made my rounds to deliver gifts as well as pick some up. My father had a small pre-Christmas party for me since I wouldn't be joining my family for Christmas day. There was a bittersweet feeling in the air and I couldn't help the slight guilt I felt. I'd never missed this holiday.

"So Chris is going to be getting my sweet potato pies, huh?" my dad said as I prepared to leave his home.

"Daddy, you told me not to make you any!" I said through wide eyes.

"I'm just messing with you, Babygirl. I'm only asking if you'll be making him any," he quickly said with a smile to calm me.

"You old man… I don't even know if he likes sweet potato pie…" _That's another one_, I thought to myself, mentally adding it to a list.

"Who doesn't? It's going to be alright." He placed a hand on my shoulder and gave me a knowing look. "It's going to be alright," he repeated.

"Are you sure?" I needed confirmation from my number one favorite man.

"Yes," he whispered to me.

"Thank you, daddy... I'll be back soon. Don't look so sad," I told him as I hugged him. I said my farewells to the remainder of the family that was left and headed home.

Being fully alert this time, I didn't miss the black Sonata. I let out a long exhale, not sure why James was at my apartment again and not very sure I wanted to find out. As I removed the key from the ignition and opened my door, he got out of his car and waited for me.

"You seem to have some liking to my place. I hope you're not moving in," I said as I walked over to him.

"I've actually drove past here a lot. Just never stopped in," he said guiltily.

"Oh," I replied, not sure of what else to say to his admission. "So what are you doing here tonight?"

"I wanted to talk to you," he said nervously.

"What about?" I asked, my tone matching his.

"About us…" My eyes squinted in confusion.

"Us? There is no us, James."

"I know that and I know you know I haven't been happy with it. I hate how you treat me like someone you used to work with instead of someone you've been intimate with. You've spoken more words to me in the last two times I've seen you than you have in a year. I know I'm to blame for that but you never even gave me a second chance. I made one mistake, Ella. How can you let that one thing take away three years?" The raw emotion in his voice caught me by surprise. It sounded like he'd been holding everything in for a long time and finally got the chance to let it out and I didn't know how to react to it.

I smoothed my hair before speaking. "James… That's all in the past. I'm with someone else now," I said in a low voice.

"How can you completely move on after just months though? We were friends for a whole year and dated for six months before we got together… How could you let him in so easily!" he yelled at me with exasperation. His sudden return and anxiety all made sense to me at that moment.

"So that's what this is about? Why you're here? Because he didn't have to work for it like you did?"

"You're giving him all the love and happiness that we created together! I worked for your heart! He just came in and took over! He took _my_ place!" he shouted back through anger. I saw the tears streaming in his lower eyelids ready to fall and I gasped as my left hands shot up to my mouth. He turned towards his car and let out a harsh oath.

With his back turned to me, I began thinking about what he said and something stuck out to me. Something I've always wondered.

"If we were happy, why did you do it? Why did you do something you knew would hurt me?" I felt a box open as those words left my lips. Like we'd traveled back to that moment in time and my heart felt every emotion I shoved into it. "You know what that has done to me? I became so insecure because of what you did… I blamed myself. I thought I gave you everything and all of me but it wasn't enough for you. You still needed more than me. I felt like shit for months. Someone not worthy to be loved unconditionally and worthy to be happy… I'm still struggling to trust my heart and not let my mind lead back to what you did – thinking all relationships will end the same. You damaged me. Why did you do that?" I wiped the tears that rapidly flowed out of my eyes with the back of my hands as I awaited his answer. He stared at me without blinking as confusion crossed his face. He blinked and took a step forward – his hands twitching to hold me but I took a step back and pain distorted his features.

"I wish I had a good answer for you, Ella, but I don't… I don't know what I was thinking. Here I am thinking about marriage and being tied down for the rest of my life when some girl comes along telling me what I'd miss if I did. I guess I got scared and I wanted one last fling. Or proof that I was making the right decision. It sounds very stupid now but it somehow made sense to me then. It had nothing to do with you though. You have to believe me and the thousandth time… I'm sorry, Ella."

"I believe you," I said after a long pause. "You are sorry but your decision had everything to do with me. The thought of being with me forever made you panic and run to someone else… You know… I've been struggling with a decision of my own and you just made me see how stupid I've been myself. I've been offered everything I wanted from you but because of you, I've been afraid to accept it. Unsure if it's the right thing… But you've just given me confirmation that it is, so I want to thank you." I looked at the watch I had on – Chris's watch – and I smiled. "It's after one in the morning and I have a flight to catch in some hours. It's about time for me to stop wasting…time. I'm sorry but I have to go."

I thought about hugging him farewell but I didn't know if he'd accept it so I waved and mouthed my goodbye before slowly walking away towards the stairs. After entering my apartments, minutes passed before I heard his engine rev and the tires squeal as they turned the corner.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Arriving at LAX the day before Christmas, I was greeted by Tim, one of Chris's burly bodyguards. I frowned when I saw him waiting for me with a sign but quickly smiled when he spotted me.

"Hey Tim? I thought Chris was picking me up, and why are you holding a sign?" I asked once I reached him. Tim was even taller than Chris and about two and half times his size so I had to stare up to look at him.

"He had to rush off to something and he couldn't get out of it but he sent me to get you," he informed me.

"Oh," I said, hoping I masked the disappointment in my voice.

"Don't worry. I've been told to take you straight to him as quick as I can. Another car will be taking your luggage to the condo." My lips quickly turned into a grin at the news and Tim smiled at the sudden change in my mood. "I'll take those. Welcome back," he said, reaching for the bag in my hand before grabbing the ones next to me.

Tim sat in the front with the driver as he rushed through traffic to a destination unknown by me. I checked myself in my compact mirror, smoothing my curls back in perfect formation and reapplying my lip gloss as the car began to slow and the driver pulled up to a big warehouse with no signs in the front. Just an address... Tim quickly stepped out and opened my door for me before having a quick word with the driver. He then told me to follow him inside the building as his long, muscular legs began a stride I practically had to jog to keep up with. I always felt so short being surrounded by Chris and his entourage.

Entering the warehouse, I heard the loud music before I stepped inside to what was a spot for a photo shoot. There were about fifteen people busily rushing around, a huge backdrop near a wall, all sorts of lighting, a huge fan, cameras, a rack of clothing, a table with shoes, another with hats, a flat screen TV, and various props. As we walked further into a room, I spotted Chris sitting in a chair surrounded by three women. One was applying make-up to his face, another was brushing his hair, and the third was holding a clipboard and speaking to him as he nodded his head. Tim cleared his throat to alert everyone of our presence and I instantly felt timorous as surrounding heads turned in our direction. A vast smile casted on Chris's face when his eyes locked with mine, causing the same expression to display on mines. He stood up quickly, forcing the women out of his way, as he rushed over to me and picked me up by the waist.

"Damn, I missed you!" He growled in my ear as he squeezed me against his almost bare skin. He was wearing a green denim vest with the front open, along with a pair of jeans and Timberland boots. I bit against the corner of my lip at his appearance and words as I held on to his shoulders. His eyes lowered as he looked at the dent my teeth were causing and his breath hitched in his throat. "Give me ten minutes!" he shouted over his shoulder as he let me back on the floor and grabbed my hand. He nodded his gratitude to Tim as we passed him and walked down the hall, stopping at the second door.

I only got a glimpse of the dressing room as Chris shut the door before he turned me towards him and his lips were crashing against mine. The abrupt action nearly knocked me off my feet but his arms were back around me before my body could move any further. When he finally departed, we both stared at each other, panting as we tried to catch our breath.

"I should've stayed away longer if that's what I get after almost a month and a half," I said once I could finally speak.

"I'd kidnap you," he responded with a straight face. I couldn't tell if he was joking or not but it sent a lightning bolt of sensation down to my coveted area. I felt his member jerk against my stomach and the muscles tightened with a yearning.

"Chris?" I said as a warning and he grinned.

"Out of my control…"

"You're working…"

"They can wait."

"No!" I shouted, trying to mask my humor. "They'd know."

"And? We're grown," he replied with a shoulder shrug.

"No," I stated again, smacking his naked arm.

"You're just making me want you even more," he growled, his face serious again.

"Chris, please?" I whined. "We can't and then go back out there in front of those people. They're probably assuming we are right now." I watched his face as he considered my words.

"Alright… I can wait but when this is over, straight to the bedroom. No stops!"

"Yes sir!" I shouted as I saluted him and he laughed.

"I like that. Let's go." He smacked my butt before letting me go and grabbing my hand again.

"Fix your face," I said as we walked out of the room, wiping the smeared lip gloss from my own.

My hand tightly compressed into his as we walked back into the big room and all eyes shifted subtly towards us. Chris merely pulled against my arm to move me closer to him as he made his way back to his chair.

After introducing me to everyone, as his girlfriend, I watched as he prepped for his photo shoot before standing near the director and watching him work his magic, getting Chris at the perfect angles for spectacular shots. Chris kept getting distracted so he then made me his focal point – against my futile attempts at declining, for him to look at as he snapped away until he was satisfied. If I was of pale skin, I'm sure I would've been beet red. To add more embarrassment upon what I'd already suffered, I was told to stand with Chris for a few personal shots.

"You actually look happy," I muttered as we took a look at the photos. I regretted the outburst as I felt Chris's body tense against mine and nervously looked up. His jaw was set as he glared down at me.

"Because I am," he replied tersely. He turned from me as he spoke to the director about the photos. Sensing his mellow anger, I tried to take a step back as they spoke but he ordered me to stay put with a slight jerk of the arm that was around me. _Great, another fight_, I thought to myself as I waited by his side. Sure enough, as we pulled away from the building, he started.

"So I _look_ happy? Meaning you don't think I am?" He asked, turned in the back seat of his Range Rover towards me.

I fumbled around in my purse for a hair tie to put up my hair before speaking – my battle stance when in a face to face argument. Finally turning to Chris, I saw the worry in his eyes as he swallowed and almost broke composure until I remembered his question.

"Why must you always get so damn touchy about small words or gestures? Just because I said you looked happy in a few photos doesn't mean I think that you aren't. It means what I said… That you _looked_ happy! When you're looking at me like you are now – pouting—," He opened his mouth to protest but I put my hand up to stop him. "and your jaw all tight, I don't believe your feelings have changed that quick."

"I'm not pouting, first of all… And second, that's different. We both know your issues." As soon as the words left his mouth, I saw the same regretting face I knew I must've had back at the warehouse. I glanced at Tim and Big Pat in front of us but decided to speak anyway. I'm sure they'd been present to a few of our spats via phone.

"That's what this is based on? My issues?" I was aware that I sounded just like him but I didn't care. "Or prior issues at least… You've shouted and talked my damn ear off about not letting go and trusting what we have but now that I finally do, you don't trust me! Are you serious!" I felt my body shaking with clamorous aggression. I counted to ten in my head to try and calm myself back down to a diplomatic demeanor. I didn't want a shouting match on my first day back with him.

"Um, can we pull over and switch seats? I'm afraid to be back here with her right now," Chris nervously asked Big Cat. I saw him slightly shake his head after glancing at me and I couldn't help but laugh.

"You cowards," I said through laughter. I saw Chris exhale with relief before he began to laugh as well.

"I've never seen or heard you get so mad," he said, removing his seat belt and sliding closer to me. "I'm sorry..."

"I bet you are…" Though the tension had receded, I was still a bit frustrated.

"Don't do me like that, Ells. I just apologized. I took it the wrong way," he pleaded with his bottom lip poked out. I looked out the corner of my eye at Big Pat as I decided if I was ready to forgive already and he subtly shook his head. "I saw that!" Chris shouted as he pointed at him and we all laughed.

"You big baby!" I said as I rested my chin on his shoulder and kissed his cheek. "I'm sorry for yelling, you guys," I turned and said to Tim and Big Pat.

"It's no problem to us." Tim said.

"Yeah, we'll rough him up a bit if you want. Just say the word," Big Pat added, with a smile at Chris.

"I don't believe this!" Chris said, sitting up with a shocked expression on his face.

"I think Tim and Pat like you," Chris randomly blurted out as his head rested across my bare stomach. We were in his bed with nothing but the blankets to cover our bodies.

"Oh my gosh, what are you talking about now?" I muttered as I rolled my eyes.

"Not like that… I mean as in family," he corrected.

"Then don't say that after sex in a distant tone of voice," I told him before flicking his ear.

"That was kind of out there, huh?" he asked with a smile as he lifted his head and looked at me. I couldn't help but laugh at how kidlike he looked.

"Um, yeah…" I said after he laid back down.

"I just mean that they seem attached and protective of you already. I was just thinking…"

"About what?"

"How easily you fit in… My mom really likes you too. She thinks you keep me in my place – balance me out…"

"Do I?"

"You do… It kind of feels like we've been together for years and we've rubbed off on each other." I could feel his face scrunch as he thought about it. "Like, I think more before I react, give myself a chance to cool off a bit when I get mad about something, and think about how others may take certain things I do and say."

"How did you rub off on me?" I asked bashfully. My insides were reeling at his words. He lifted his head to look at me again.

"You're more social and affectionate for sure. I noticed how you only spoke when someone would speak to you or how you didn't touch me unless I touched you first but when we got out of the car today, you gave Pat and Tim a hug and wrapped your arms around me… And you kept kissing my face as we drove home."

"You really like that, huh?" I asked, smiling at his smile and his last four words. He nodded his head shyly. "You could be right… I'm not really open and affectionate with people until I've known them a while… Or unless they're kids."

"I like the way you are around kids. You glow around them and remind me of a character from a fairytale," he said and I giggled. He leaned forward and kissed me.

"I've always had a soft spot for children. A want to take care of them and make them happy… I see that in you too. How you treat a stranger's child like they're your niece or nephew. It's so heartwarming."

"We'd be the perfect parents," he said in a matter-of-fact tone, causing my eyes to widen. "I'm just saying," he quickly added as he observed my face.

"I've never thought about being a mother," I admitted to him.

"Really? But you're a teacher and I saw how you were with you nieces and the other kids at Tracy's wedding." I couldn't tell if he was confused or shocked.

"Yeah, but I've never thought of how I'd be with my own children – how they'd think of me as a mom and how I'd raise them. I just hope we have a better bond than me and my mother." I felt the emotions rising and tried to keep them at bay by tucking my bottom lip under my teeth. Chris immediately sat up and moved us around so I was now in his arms as my head rested on his chest.

"I didn't mean to get that deep," he said apologetically.

"It's okay," I muttered as I wrapped one arm around his neck and placed a hand in between his shoulder and neck. Feeling the warmth of his skin and the drum of his heartbeat against the side of my head made me very comfortable and I yawned.

"Enough talking… We've been in bed almost two hours and neither of us has slept after this long day." I looked at the watch on my wrist – his watch – and it was almost five. I'd landed at ten in the morning. "A piece of me looks good on you," he said, referring to the watch.

"I like a piece of you always being with me," I said, looking into his eyes. He gave me another kiss and held me tighter as he scooted down off the headboard and on to the pillow. I don't know how long it took me to drift off to sleep but I relished in the sort of solace I felt with him as he rubbed circles into my back.

Slowly opening my eyes, I found myself still on Chris. One of his arms was wrapped around me and the other was holding his phone to his ear as he spoke to someone. I was about to get up to let him have some privacy but he shook his head and then leaned down to kiss my head.

"Yeah, set that up for me as soon as possible then hit me back with the details… I can do that one too but I won't stay long…" He looked down at me with a curious look before speaking again. "Pull some things for Ella too. I'll text you her sizes…" I quizzical look crossed my face but was quickly replaced with a look of urgency. I mouthed "bathroom" to him and he removed his arm so I could get up.

I felt his eyes watching me as I sat up and reached for the first thing near my feet - his tank top. I slid it over my bare body before getting up and treading across the room to go and relieve myself. As I stepped out of the bathroom to wash my hands, he was just ending his call as he stood near the bed pulling on his underwear.

"Just send it to my email. Give me at least an hour though… Alright, peace… You should walk around like that all the time," he turned and said to me as I walked towards him.

"Yeah, let's see how much work you'd get done if I did that… Not to mention how you'd handle it when company came over." I rubbed my hands up and down his torso as he grinned down at me.

"They won't be here tomorrow. Just the two of us…" He wrapped his arms around me and swayed us from side to side.

"Yeah, we'll see how that plays out," I said with a snort. Someone was always coming by unannounced.

"Wouldn't matter anyway… They already know."

"Know what?"

"That you're mine," he stated matter-of-factly. A tingling chill made its way through my body.

"You've said that during sex a few times," I told him bashfully and his face lit up with both shock and embarrassment.

"So what though? It's the truth!" he replied, attempting to look and sound hard.

"Maybe…" I said, quickly stepping away from him before he could grab me. "Where is my luggage? I need a shower," I told him as I walked out of the room.

"I'll get it started for us! Then we're going out to eat!" he called after me.

I woke up early in great spirits as I went downstairs to start breakfast for Chris and me. I peaked over at the Christmas tree which now had his gifts joined with mine, laughing at the fact that neither of us followed the one gift rule. By the time Chris finally woke, breakfast was done and Christmas music was filling the condo from my iPod.

"Merry Christmas!" I chimed in a sing-song voice as he walked into the kitchen.

"Merry Christmas," he said after giving me a kiss. "So you're one of those holiday people, huh?"

"You're the one who has holiday cookie cutters! I know you didn't decorate this place though."

"I had someone come in and do it… For you…"

"Well I thank you. I made French toast Christmas trees. Have I told you how much I love your kitchen?" I said as I leaned on the breakfast bar.

"You have… Have I told you how much I love seeing you in it?"

"You have…"

"I should get upstairs living room pushed back so I can watch you cook from above," he said with a grin.

"Ha-ha… Go have a seat," I said, hitting him with the dish towel.

As I placed breakfast on the table, Chris sung along with the Temptations. I'd never get over hearing him sing live all the time. After breakfast, we lounged on the couch – both of us too nervous to open each other's gifts – and listened to the music until the playlist ended. We turned to each other at the same time and burst into a fit of laughter because of each other's raised eyebrows.

"Well they're not going to magically open their selves so…" I stood up and grabbed his hand, forcing him to get off of the couch. I sat crossed legged in front of the tree and when he joined me, I handed him one of his gifts. I watched with my breath held as he slowly peeled the wrapping paper from the medium box. His eyes lit up when he saw race car, which was a mini model of his Bugatti Veyron sports car.

"Where did you get this!" he asked, staring at it through the box.

"I got it custom made," I told him, relieved that he loved it.

"Can I go play with it right now?" He looked at me expectantly.

"Men and their toys…" I muttered as I looked at the ceiling.

"But that's why you bought it though!"

"Shut up! Open another one," I said, trying not to laugh.

"Nope, your turn..." He picked up a small flat box and handed it to me. I knew it was jewelry and my hand shook as I took from him. "Before you open it, remember that this is me and a part of how I express my love," he said nervously.

Opening the little black box that read BARNEYS NEW YORK, my jaw dropped. There was the most gorgeous pair of imperial jade and diamond butterfly earrings that I'd ever seen. I delicately grazed my middle across the intricate butterfly detailing on the jade and it felt like touching carved marble. I looked at Chris and he was watching, waiting for my reaction the gift.

"These are beautiful," I said in a low voice as I looked at them again. "They look too fragile to hold, let alone wear… These are for me?" I'd never gotten such a wonderful gift.

"Of course… So you like them?" he asked, still nervous. I looked at him like he was slow and then nodded my head slowly as a smile formed. "And you're not going to kick my ass for getting you an expensive gift?" I looked at the earrings again and felt as if they were putting me in a trance. I shook my head.

"They've put a spell on me… Or you have," I told him through narrowed eyes. Not removing my eyes from the earrings, I put my hand on another gift and slid it towards him. He laughed at me as he ripped off the paper. I guess the nervousness had went away.

"Whoa! These are sick!" he said as he pulled out the two pair of custom airbrushed shoes. The Air Force 1s had Spongebob on them and the Nike Dunks had The Avengers. I laughed at the childlike expression on his face.

After opening two more expensive gifts from Chris – gold Louboutin heels to match the gold in the earrings and a new iPad – I watched as he opened my final two gifts for him. I'd gotten the idea to make him a set of coupons from the guy offering them for a carwash outside of Starbucks in San Francisco. The coupons varied from a free car wash, breakfast in bed, strip show, and a massage to "yes" and "no" coupons and an "I'm right" coupon. He really enjoyed those. The last gift I watched with my stomach in knots as he opened it. It was the gift I'd struggled the most over.

"Why do you look so nervous? Like you're about to hand me divorce papers…" he said as he paused before opening the cardboard envelope.

"We're not married. Open it," I rushed out, staring down at my hands. He made an odd sound before I heard him ripping the strip off the envelope and I held my breath as I heard the contents being removed.

"Ella?" he whispered after a long moment. "Ella, is this… Does this mean…" I finally looked up and almost laughed at the utter shock on his face. I nodded my head and his mouth dropped.

"I didn't renew my lease… I have a month to move out."

"And you're moving in with me?" he asked in disbelief.

"I mean, if you still want me to," I replied coyly with a shoulder shrug. "Or I could find another place-." Before I got the chance to finish the rest of my sentence, Chris leaped forward and tackled me to the floor. I laughed in his mouth as he kissed me.

"Best Christmas ever!" he shouted with a huge grin on his face. "Can I go play with my car now?"

"Sure, honey," I replied in a motherly voice.

"Yes! I love you!

Watching him as he happily played with his car, and then running as he tried to crash it into my feet, gave me a weird affirmatiom that I'd made the right decision. I knew my life was about to change but Iwas ready for it as long as he was faithfully by my side.


End file.
